02.19
학생이 쓴 원문
This is my second writing. Today, I want to write about my job. My job is a counselor. Actually, I changed my major few years ago, so it\'s my second job. My major in University was chemical engineering and I became a chemical engineer after graduation. I entered one of the most famous and big company, and they gave me a high salary. Although I worked in a company which most people wanted to entered, I was not happy and never feel satisfaction. Sadly,when I applied for University, I choose my major not thinking deeply and I did not consider about my aptitude. While I was working as an engineer, I constantly looked for a job that was fit for me. After 5 years of working as an engineer, I studied to enter a graduate school for Psychology mater\'s degree. It was really hard, but I finally got in to a graduate school! After that I study psychology and I\'ve been training as a counselor. Now, I love my job, because it\'s very meaningful that I can help people who has hard time in his/her life.
강사 첨삭
Hello there, May!
(^_^)
A happy Wednesday to you.
Thank you so much for this composition.
I can say that you really tried hard to express your thoughts and it\'s actually good.
I just made some revisions to make your sentences easier to understand.
I won\'t be here on Friday because my grandmother died, but another teacher will call you.
I encourage you to take the sub-class. Have a good night!
See you on Monday.
__Teacher Mayleen :)
This is my second writing. Today, I want to write about my job. My job is a counselor.
>>> This is my second time writing and today, I want to write about my job as a counselor.
Actually, I changed my major few years ago, so it\'s my second job.
>>> CORRECT
>>> OR: I actually changed my major few years ago so it\'s my second job.
My major in University was chemical engineering and I became a chemical engineer after graduation.
>>> My major was Chemical Engineering and I worked as a chemical engineer after graduation.
I entered one of the most famous and big company, and they gave me a high salary.
>>> I entered a famous big company and they offered me a high salary.
Although I worked in a company which most people wanted to entered, I was not happy and never feel satisfaction.
>>> Although I worked in a company where most people want to work, I was not happy and I never felt satisfied.
Sadly,when I applied for University, I choose my major not thinking deeply and I did not consider about my aptitude.
>>> Sadly, I chose my major without considering my aptitude when I went to college.
While I was working as an engineer, I constantly looked for a job that was fit for me.
>>> While I was working as an engineer, I constantly looked for a job that\'s suitable for me.
After 5 years of working as an engineer, I studied to enter a graduate school for Psychology mater\'s degree.
>>> After 5 years of working as an engineer, I decided to enter a graduate school to earn my master\'s degree in Psychology.
It was really hard, but I finally got in to a graduate school! After that I study psychology and I\'ve been training as a counselor.
>>> It was hard to enter a graduate school, but I got in! I studied Psychology after that then I trained to be a counselor.
Now, I love my job, because it\'s very meaningful that I can help people who has hard time in his/her life.
>>> I love my job now and it\'s very meaningful that I get to help people who are having a hard in life.
파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.