10/30 homework
학생이 쓴 원문
I absolutely agree with that.
The treatment fo diseases after we find it takes a lot of money and time.
Moreover, it is not only for me, with my family.
In Korea, the hospital insurance system is quite good compared with another country.
Nevertheless, if someone is hospitalized, family finance is rapidly getting worse.
Even when I went to a dental clinic a few years ago, I spend my big money to cure my teeth.
But I know the prevention of diseases is not too easy.
Just now we look healthy because I don\'t have any pain.
So, I drink a alcohol and unhealthy food just freely.
Although I seriously say I need an exercise now, the reason I couldn\'t start enthusiastically is that I didn\'t feel any serious response from my physical body.
However, I know that it\'s too late in most cases when we find a disease in a hospital.
I heard that people earn money for the last three months in a hospital in USA because the hospital insurance is very poor so they pay a lot of money in a hospital.
강사 첨삭
Hi [이름]! Thank you for your thoughts on this one. I appreciate it! ^ ^
You made a good point and I definitely agree with you. Prevention is really better than cure. I went to the doctor a few years ago and I was told that I have gallstones and fatty liver. I might end up getting an operation if I don\'t change my lifestyle. Of course I don\'t want to be operated neither I don\'t want to spend a huge amount of money on medicines. So I decided to have a change of lifestyle. I became mindful of what I eat and I started exercising. My sister noticed that I have lost weight and told me that I didn\'t have to go to the gym anymore. I was surprised with the stereotypes that people think about the reasons why people go to the gym. Of course we want to be fit, but aside from that is giving your body a healthy one so it can thank you later and rip the benefits of a good body! ^ ^
-Teacher Jedah
>>CORRECT
The treatment fo diseases after we find it takes a lot of money and time.
The treatment fo diseases after we find it takes a lot of money and time.
>>The treatment of diseases after it has been discovered takes a lot of money and time.
Moreover, it is not only for me, with my family.
>>Moreover, it is not only for me but for my family as well.
In Korea, the hospital insurance system is quite good compared with another country.
In Korea, the hospital insurance system is quite good compared with another country.
>>CORRECT or
>>In Korea, the health care system is quite good compared with other countries.
Nevertheless, if someone is hospitalized, family finance is rapidly getting worse.
Nevertheless, if someone is hospitalized, family finance is rapidly getting worse.
>>Nevertheless, if someone is hospitalized, the family\'s finances will suffer tremendously.
Even when I went to a dental clinic a few years ago, I spend my big money to cure my teeth.
Even when I went to a dental clinic a few years ago, I spend my big money to cure my teeth.
>>Even when I went to the dental clinic a few years ago, I spent a huge amount of money fixing my teeth.
But I know the prevention of diseases is not too easy.
But I know the prevention of diseases is not too easy.
>>But I know that the prevention of diseases is not easy.
Just now we look healthy because I don\'t have any pain.
Just now we look healthy because I don\'t have any pain.
>>Right now, we look healthy because we feel no pain.
So, I drink a alcohol and unhealthy food just freely.
So, I drink a alcohol and unhealthy food just freely.
>>So I just drink alcohol and unhealthy foods carelessly.
Although I seriously say I need an exercise now, the reason I couldn\'t start enthusiastically is that I didn\'t feel any serious response from my physical body.
Although I seriously say I need an exercise now, the reason I couldn\'t start enthusiastically is that I didn\'t feel any serious response from my physical body.
>>Although I seriously say I need to exercise now, the reason I couldn\'t start enthusiastically is that I don\'t feel any serious ailments in my body.
However, I know that it\'s too late in most cases when we find a disease in a hospital.
However, I know that it\'s too late in most cases when we find a disease in a hospital.
>>However, it would be too late to act once we\'ve found out that we have a disease.
I heard that people earn money for the last three months in a hospital in USA because the hospital insurance is very poor so they pay a lot of money in a hospital.
I heard that people earn money for the last three months in a hospital in USA because the hospital insurance is very poor so they pay a lot of money in a hospital.
>>I heard that people paid a lot for the last three months in a hospital in the USA because the hospital\'s insurance policy is very poor.
파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.