101. Homework

2018-04-18 · 첨삭 강사 Rose

학생이 쓴 원문

ESSAY: Children should never be educated at home by their parents. Do you agree or disagree? I partly agree with this. That’s because few parents are not suitable for their children’s education since they are criminals or strangers in the societies. In this case, people who are their neighbor and already knew these situations must isolate the children from their parents by some organizations. The children are probably to become a criminal same as their parents, I am just telling about possibilities, more than other children who have been educated from right family since they have seen their parent’s life style and habits. Hence, when the children become an adult, they will not know they are troublesome or making some annoying to the others since they think it’s right way whatever they do. Anyways, I more agree with the other side which children should be educated at home by their parents who always tried to teach them right ways. Because most of children’s time might be spent with their parents, so they are naturally learned from their parents. That’s why ancestors had said that ‘kids are mirror of their parents’. Hence, parents must to careful whatever they do in front of the children.

강사 첨삭

Education is very important, Jason^^

That\'s why as parents, we must choose what\'s best for them!

ESSAY: Children should never be educated at home by their parents. Do you agree or disagree?
>>CORRECT!
I partly agree with this. That’s because few parents are not suitable for their children’s education since they are criminals or strangers in the societies.

>>I partly agree with this, that’s because few parents are not suitable for their children’s education since they are criminals or strangers in the society.

In this case, people who are their neighbor and already knew these situations must isolate the children from their parents by some organizations.

>>CORRECT!

The children are probably to become a criminal same as their parents, I am just telling about possibilities, more than other children who have been educated from right family since they have seen their parent’s life style and habits.

>> The children will probably become criminals like their parents, I am just telling about possibilities, more than other children who have been educated from right families since they have seen their parent’s lifestyle and habits.

Hence, when the children become an adult, they will not know they are troublesome or making some annoying to the others since they think it’s right way whatever they do.
>>Hence, when the children become adults, they will not know if they are troublesome or annoying to others since they think whatever they do is right.
Anyways, I more agree with the other side which children should be educated at home by their parents who always tried to teach them right ways.

>>CORRECT!

Because most of children’s time might be spent with their parents, so they are naturally learned from their parents.

>>Because most children’s time is spent with their parents, they naturally learn from their parents.

That’s why ancestors had said that ‘kids are mirror of their parents’.

>>That’s why ancestors had said that ,‘Kids are the mirror of their parents’.

Hence, parents must to careful whatever they do in front of the children.

>>Hence, parents must be careful whatever they do in front of their children.

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