11/22 homework

2018-12-03 · 첨삭 강사 Jedah

학생이 쓴 원문

[What is your view about gender discrimination?] This is one of hot issues in Korea, in the world too. Only my mother’s period, most women were homemakers, my mom too. At that time, although men and women works equally, salary of women was lower than men. I can not understand, but it was natural at that time. But, nowadays, the times have changed, most women have own job. After they got married or have baby, they still want to work. And young people have an idea that men and women have to equally do for housework because both of them work in the society. However, the social system or mindset of company representatives is not comprehend for this problem. Sometimes, they make this problem to the problem between men and women. I think we don’t need to argue between men and women. Specially, in Korea, there are many argument between young men and women. I think this is very serious social problem, the government should mediate this unacceptable war.

강사 첨삭

Hi [이름]! Thank you for catching up with your homework! ^ ^ I appreciate it! ^ ^ You gave an awesome view on this one. Like what you have said, something must be done with this issue. ^ ^

-Teacher Jedah

This is one of hot issues in Korea, in the world too.

>>This is one of the hot issues not only in Korea but all over the world.
Only my mother’s period, most women were homemakers, my mom too.

>>During my mother\'s time, most women were homemakers, so was my mom.
At that time, although men and women works equally, salary of women was lower than men.

>>At that time, although men and women worked equally, the salary of women was lower than men.
I can not understand, but it was natural at that time.

>>Correct or

>>I could not understand it, but it was the social norm at that time.
But, nowadays, the times have changed, most women have own job.

>>But, nowadays, times have changed, most women have jobs.
After they got married or have baby, they still want to work.

>>After they get married or have a baby, they still want to continue working.
And young people have an idea that men and women have to equally do for housework because both of them work in the society.

>>And young couples these days share household chores because both of them work.
However, the social system or mindset of company representatives is not comprehend for this problem.

>>However, the social system or mindset of companies\' representatives do not understand the issue well.
Sometimes, they make this problem to the problem between men and women.

>>Sometimes they contribute to the problem between equality of men and women in the work force.
I think we don’t need to argue between men and women.

>>I think there should not be any argument between men and women when it comes to their rights.
Specially, in Korea, there are many argument between young men and women.

>>Specially, in Korea, there are many arguments between young men and women.
I think this is very serious social problem, the government should mediate this unacceptable war.

>>I think this is a very serious social problem, the government should mediate this unacceptable war.

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