12/26 homework

2019-12-26 · 첨삭 강사 Jedah

학생이 쓴 원문

[What lessons in life have you learned for this year?] This year was very unstable and anxious for me. It came from the pressure of the performance and anxiety of my job. So, in order to overcome worries, I tried a lot of new things to relax by myself. I have learned meditation and enjoyed art and symphony music. And I newly realized the joy of going to the library. I write a diary and report my daily work every day. I made efforts to find myself and concentrate on the inside of me. I knew that finding goal of life and my peace can not be succeeded by my husband or mother. Those works were very precious for me. I am 32 years old this year. I am not so young, but not too old. Sometimes it makes me crazy because I want to live very well. But I don\'t know what is well-being life. I think I am still finding the way to be well being. But, I realized that a peaceful mind and a stable relationship with family are the basic and strong foundation of my life.

강사 첨삭

Hi [이름]! Thank you for taking the time in doing your homework despite your very busy schedule. I really appreciate the effort! ^ ^
Thanks for sharing your thoughts here too! We all desire to have what we want in life. But, one thing\'s for sure; our happiness comes from within us and not expect to be given by others. ^ ^
-Teacher Jedah
 
This year was very unstable and anxious for me.
>>CORRECT
It came from the pressure of the performance and anxiety of my job.
>>CORRECT
So, in order to overcome worries, I tried a lot of new things to relax by myself.
>>So, in order to overcome worries, I tried a lot of new things by myself to relax.
I have learned meditation and enjoyed art and symphony music.
>>CORRECT
And I newly realized the joy of going to the library.
>>CORRECT
I write a diary and report my daily work every day.
>>I write a diary and jot down my daily work every day.
I made efforts to find myself and concentrate on the inside of me.
>>I made efforts to find myself and focused more on the inner side of me. 
I knew that finding goal of life and my peace can not be succeeded by my husband or mother.
>>I knew that finding a goal in life and my peace is not something my husband nor my mother could give.
Those works were very precious for me.
>>CORRECT
I am 32 years old this year.
>>CORRECT
I am not so young, but not too old.
>>CORRECT
Sometimes it makes me crazy because I want to live very well.
>>CORRECT
But I don\'t know what is well-being life.
>>But, I\'m still trying to figure out what is good for my well being.
I think I am still finding the way to be well being.
>>I think I am still finding the way to have a well being.
But, I realized that a peaceful mind and a stable relationship with family are the basic and strong foundation of my life.
>>CORRECT

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