3/24 homework
학생이 쓴 원문
I oppose plastic surgery for cosmetic purposes.
However, If I need it in the future, I would do that.
I think that plastic surgery is not necessarily a bad thing.
It helps those who must have plastic surgery.
They are people with severe physical disabilities or people with discomfort in life.
My mom had an upper eyelid surgery a few years ago.
She had an upper eyelid, but as she grew older, the upper eyelid sat down and covered her eyes.
It was very uncomfortable, and she was very satisfied after the surgery.
Nonetheless, I strongly oppose the advertisement for plastic surgery in many hospitals.
There are many private hospitals for plastic surgery in Korea and they advertise with pretty girls and boys at the head.
It makes a lot of young people that they can easily be beautiful within a short time, and it will help them live in this society.
But, we should know that although it helps a little, it can not change our life or personality or heart, and they determine most of our lives.
강사 첨삭
Hi [이름],
Thanks again for the reply. I was just curious about your opinion on this matter and since our topic has something to do with \"would\", I wanted to ask you this question, and thanks for the response:)
-Rachel
I oppose plastic surgery for cosmetic purposes.
>> correct (just add to after oppose-oppose to)
However, If I need it in the future, I would do that.
However, If I need it in the future, I would do that.
>> correct
I think that plastic surgery is not necessarily a bad thing. It helps those who must have plastic surgery.
I think that plastic surgery is not necessarily a bad thing. It helps those who must have plastic surgery.
>> correct
>> OR: I think that plastic surgery is not necessarily a bad thing because it helps those who must have plastic surgery. ( we add the two short sentences)
>> OR: I think that plastic surgery is not necessarily a bad thing because it helps those who must have plastic surgery. ( we add the two short sentences)
They are people with severe physical disabilities or people with discomfort in life.
>> correct (awesome)
My mom had an upper eyelid surgery a few years ago.
>> correct
She had an upper eyelid, but as she grew older, the upper eyelid sat down and covered her eyes.
My mom had an upper eyelid surgery a few years ago.
>> correct
She had an upper eyelid, but as she grew older, the upper eyelid sat down and covered her eyes.
>> She had an upper eyelid, but as she grew older, the upper eyelid drooped or sagged and covered her eyes.
It was very uncomfortable, and she was very satisfied after the surgery.
It was very uncomfortable, and she was very satisfied after the surgery.
>> correct
Nonetheless, I strongly oppose the advertisement for plastic surgery in many hospitals.
Nonetheless, I strongly oppose the advertisement for plastic surgery in many hospitals.
>> correct (perfect!)
There are many private hospitals for plastic surgery in Korea and they advertise with pretty girls and boys at the head.
There are many private hospitals for plastic surgery in Korea and they advertise with pretty girls and boys at the head.
>> correct
It makes a lot of young people that they can easily be beautiful within a short time, and it will help them live in this society.
It makes a lot of young people that they can easily be beautiful within a short time, and it will help them live in this society.
>> correct (acceptable in spoken English)
>> OR: It lures a lot of young people to think that they can easily become beautiful instantly and it will help them survive in this society.
But, we should know that although it helps a little, it can not change our life or personality or heart, and they determine most of our lives.
But, we should know that although it helps a little, it can not change our life or personality or heart, and they determine most of our lives.
>> correct (amazing)
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