3-48th Homework

Hello there [이름]! ^_^

I\'m happy that you\'re feeling better.

Thank you for writing in our composition board again.

I appreciate the time and the effort you\'ve given to write this essay.

Keeping secrets has it\'s advantages and disadvantages.

I agree when you said that sometimes, we need to keep secrets to maintain our privacy.

In this day and age, private information can easily be accessed with just the tip of our fingers and most of us are in danger of getting our personal lives exposed. That\'s why it\'s important to keep an air of secrecy in some aspects of our lives.

On the other hand, keeping too much secrets is also not good because it\'s too much of a burden.

Anyhow, I hope you\'re doing great.

See you again tomorrow. ^_^

~Teacher C[이름]

I think secrets are needed to keep it in private area.

>> [Do you mean]: I think secrets are needed to keep some areas in our lives private. 

Nowadays, many private information are floating on the web sites.

>> CORRECT!

OR >> There are many private information floating on the web sites these days.
So, if you want to get it, you can take it easily, for example, bank account number, social security number.

>> So, if you want to get it, you can take it easily, for example, bank account number and social security number.

OR >> So, if you want to get it, you can take it easily. An example of this private information would be bank account number and social security number.
The internet of Korea is the most important thing and has been developed as a top place of the world.

>> The internet system of Korea is the most important thing and has been developed as a top place in the world.
But we run out of lack about the security consciousness to protect the private information.

>> But we lack security consciousness to protect the private information.

OR >> But we ran out of security consciousness that would help us protect our private information.
In this point of view, to keep the secretes is valuable.

>> In this point of view, keeping secrets is valuable.
On the other hand, secretes might be harmful to you.

>> On the other hand, secrets might be harmful to you.
As we live for many years, we can get a sick that could not be easily cured.

>> As we live for many years, we can get sick and our sickness could not be easily cured.
In this case, we have to air of your sickness to all.

>> In this case, you have to air (off) your sickness to all.
It has explicitly an important thing.

>> [Do you mean]: It is explicitly an important thing. 
The sickness is very not simple to everybody, so many people study and devote to find the cure.

>> The sickness is not very simple to everybody so many people study and devote their time to find the cure.
If you never say about your sickness, nobody knows your situation.

>> If you never say something about your sickness, nobody knows your situation.
Even if the sickness is not cured promptly after speaking out, someone is anxious about you.

>> CORRECT!

OR >> Even if the sickness is not cured promptly after speaking out, someone is worried about you.
One could fortunately the cure, someday.

>> One could fortunately find the cure someday.