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2013-02-15 · 첨삭 강사 Chloe

학생이 쓴 원문

I believe to make own way for presenting my thought is very important to live life. So I try to edit many video and make powerpoint files to present I want to say. It was also asset of the position, and whatever undertook to me I can make it possible. Ever since I studied International cooperation at college, I have done well and got a All A+ degree in two session. It is result of my announcement skill. So I think that my training at Kwang Woon University, experience of sales and make contents skill will help me develop PR and Salse Management, and I would like to have a chance to explain how I can put them to work for your organization. A position which offers an opportunity to utilize my training in these fields would be ideal for me. The enclosed resume describes my education and work experience, but I would like to discuss the possibility with you soon. I look forward to your answer.

강사 첨삭

Wow! Sir Nathan, I checked your five compositions in a row. I think I deserve to take a rest after my class. Oh! It was really tiring. Anyway Sir, please study my correstions for you. Enjoy the rest of your night. -Teacher Chloe I believe to make own way for presenting my thought is very important to live life. >>I believe that making my own ways to express my ideas and thoughts is very important in my life.  So I try to edit many video and make powerpoint files to present I want to say. >>So I edit many videos and make powerpoint files to express myself. >>So I edit many videos and make powerpoint files to express the ideas and thoughts I want to share.   It was also asset of the position, and whatever undertook to me I can make it possible. >>I think it is one of my assets. Whether I am under pressure or not I make impossible things possible. >>I think it is one of my assets. Whether I am under pressure or not I make all things possible. Ever since I studied International cooperation at college, I have done well and got a All A+ degree in two session. It is result of my announcement skill. >>I studied International Cooperation when I was in college and I have done well. I got very good grades in this subject. So I think that my training at Kwang Woon University, experience of sales and make contents skill will help me develop PR and Salse Management, and I would like to have a chance to explain how I can put them to work for your organization. >>So I think my training at Kwang Woon University. My experience in sales and making contents skills helped me develop my PR and Sales Management skils. So, I would like to have a chance to explain how I can put them to work for your organization.A position which offers an opportunity to utilize my training in these fields would be ideal for me.>>Correct! The enclosed resume describes my education and work experience, but I would like to discuss the possibility with you soon. >>The enclosed resume includes my educational background and work experiences, but I would like to discuss the possibility with you soon. I look forward to your answer. >>Correct!

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