5-8th Homework
학생이 쓴 원문
The fireworks works for about 2 hours.
There are other fireworks, excluding the line fireworks, that are a floating thing and a dropping thing.
During the line fireworks were operating, the floating things was also operating on the river.
The floating fireworks is literally to float the lamps which consist of the paper.
So, in the dark night it was very romantic.
The last thing is to drop the big balls which compose of the blanches at the cliff.
When they were dropping, the framing balls conflicted with the cliff.
At that time, we could see the small flame.
Those are three fireworks that we could see in our travel.
We stayed at a small house that composed of the red mud and reeds.
Especially, the house's roof is also composed of the rice reeds, that is a traditional house.
The host of the house grows the cotton at her land.
Actually, it was my first time I saw the cotton that grows in the land.
So, it was very interesting and I collect its seeds in the cotton balls.
강사 첨삭
The fireworks works for about 2 hours.
>> The fireworks lasted for about 2 hours.
There are other fireworks, excluding the line fireworks, that are a floating thing and a dropping thing.
There are other fireworks, excluding the line fireworks, that are a floating thing and a dropping thing.
>> [Do you mean]: There were other fireworks aside from the line of fireworks that were floating and dropping.
During the line fireworks were operating, the floating things was also operating on the river.
During the line fireworks were operating, the floating things was also operating on the river.
>> While the line of fireworks were being lighted, the floating fireworks were also lighted along the river.
The floating fireworks is literally to float the lamps which consist of the paper.
>> The floating fireworks were literally floating lamps enclosed in a paper.
So, in the dark night it was very romantic.
So, in the dark night it was very romantic.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> So, it looked very romantic in the dark night.
The last thing is to drop the big balls which compose of the blanches at the cliff.
The last thing is to drop the big balls which compose of the blanches at the cliff.
>> The last thing done was the dropping of the big balls which composed of blanches at the cliff.
When they were dropping, the framing balls conflicted with the cliff.
When they were dropping, the framing balls conflicted with the cliff.
>> [Do you mean]: When they were dropping, the framing balls ignited because of the cliff.
At that time, we could see the small flame.
At that time, we could see the small flame.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> We saw the small flame at that time.
Those are three fireworks that we could see in our travel.
Those are three fireworks that we could see in our travel.
>> Those were the three fireworks display that we saw when we traveled.
We stayed at a small house that composed of the red mud and reeds.
We stayed at a small house that composed of the red mud and reeds.
>> We stayed in a small house made of red mud and reeds.
Especially, the house\'s roof is also composed of the rice reeds, that is a traditional house.
Especially, the house\'s roof is also composed of the rice reeds, that is a traditional house.
>> The house is especially made of rice reeds which is used in a traditional house.
The host of the house grows the cotton at her land.
>> The host of the house grows cotton in her land.
Actually, it was my first time I saw the cotton that grows in the land.
Actually, it was my first time I saw the cotton that grows in the land.
>> Actually, it was my first time to see cotton that grows in the land.
So, it was very interesting and I collect its seeds in the cotton balls.
So, it was very interesting and I collect its seeds in the cotton balls.
>> So, it was very interesting and I collected the seeds in the cotton balls.
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