6-10th Homework

2018-02-07 · 첨삭 강사 Blair

학생이 쓴 원문

The winter Olympic games will be held this month in Pyungchang, Korea. Indeed, I hoped to see any games in person so that I tried to get some tickets. Finally, I didn't do that since it was so expensive and there was no a proper time to see the games. Many games will be held outside even cold weather. One or two games will be held inside but the ticket is also expensive. One of all games that I'm interested in is a ski jump. It was so fascinating when I saw it on a TV. So, I tried to see it in person but I finally gave up seeing at a stadium. It's because of the time of the competition. The time of ski jump competition is 9 PM. Nowadays, the weather become more and more cold even the time goes toward the spring. The temperature would be so cold and my family would catch a cold after watching the competition. Additionally, I don't want to stay such a cold weather for several hours. Finally, my last choice is to see the competition on the TV in the warm house eating something.

강사 첨삭

The winter Olympic games will be held this month in Pyungchang, Korea.
Indeed, I hoped to see any games in person so that I tried to get some tickets.
Finally, I didn\'t do that since it was so expensive and there was no a proper time to see the games.
Many games will be held outside even cold weather.
One or two games will be held inside but the ticket is also expensive.
One of all games that I\'m interested in is a ski jump.
It was so fascinating when I saw it on a TV.
So, I tried to see it in person but I finally gave up seeing at a stadium.
It\'s because of the time of the competition.
The time of ski jump competition is 9 PM.
Nowadays, the weather become more and more cold even the time goes toward the spring.
The temperature would be so cold and my family would catch a cold after watching the competition.
Additionally, I don\'t want to stay such a cold weather for several hours.
Finally, my last choice is to see the competition on the TV in the warm house eating something.


The winter Olympic games will be held this month in Pyungchang, Korea. Indeed, I hoped to watch all the games in person so I tried to buy tickets, however I wasn\'t able to do it since it was so expensive and it is not a good time to watch those games because most of it will be held outside even in a freezing weather. One to two games will be held inside but the ticket costs a lot as well. One of the games that I am interested in, is the ski jump, it was so fascinating when I saw it on TV. I\'ve dreamt on seeing it in person but I finally gave up seeing at the stadium. Another factor is the time of the competition, Ski Jump competition starts at 9PM, and these days the weather is freezing and could make my family sick while watching at the stadium. Additionally, I don\'t plan to stay outside in such a freezing weather for several hours. Finally, my last choice is to watch it on the television with warm and cozy ambience.

파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.

다른 영어첨삭교정 보기

영어첨삭교정 ·