6-31th Homework

2018-04-20 · 첨삭 강사 Don

학생이 쓴 원문

I don't know about the situation of the children who live abroad. But I know that it is different between western society and eastern society. In eastern society, especially eastern Asia, the private education is absolutely essential to jump up in the society. In Korea, the private education has been a serious society problem for a long time. It is because of the expensive private education. The government had even prohibited it and then some one secretly did do it. Anyway, my children also take some private education. We have another reason my children take the private education. My wife and I work so we don't stay at home after school. And we don't have some one who takes care of my children. So, the solution that we found was the private education. When we select the private education, we absolutely agree with children's opinion. But after selecting and starting it, they have to do it at least for 1 year even if it is very boring. So, they seriously select items whenever they do.

강사 첨삭

HI [이름]!

Thank for including this in your homework. I learned something from your essay. I know that it is one of the serious problems in Korea but the most important thing is your children are studying. It doesn\'t matter if it is in private school or private school. You should be a proud dad!

I don\'t know about the situation of the children who live abroad.

>>CORRECT

But I know that it is different between western society and eastern society.

>>CORRECT

In eastern society, especially eastern Asia, the private education is absolutely essential to jump up in the society.

>> In eastern society, especially in eastern Asia, private education is absolutely essential to jump up in the society.

In Korea, the private education has been a serious society problem for a long time.

>> In Korea, private education has been a serious society problem for a long time.

It is because of the expensive private education.

>> CORRECT

The government had even prohibited it and then some one secretly did do it.

>> The government even prohibited it and then some people secretly do it.

Anyway, my children also take some private education.

>> Anyway, my children are also taking some private education.

We have another reason my children take the private education.

>> We have reasons why our children are taking part in a private education.

My wife and I work so we don\'t stay at home after school.

>> My wife and I are working so we don\'t stay at home.

And we don\'t have some one who takes care of my children.

>> And no one will take good care of my children.

So, the solution that we found was the private education.

>> So, the solution that we agreed was to let our children study in a private education.

When we select the private education, we absolutely agree with children\'s opinion.

>> When we select private education, we also consider the opinion of our children.

But after selecting and starting it, they have to do it at least for 1 year even if it is very boring.

>> But even if they have agreed on it, they have to study in a private school for 1 year even if it is boring.

So, they seriously select items whenever they do.

>>CORRECT

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