About bronze trophy on my desk
학생이 쓴 원문
To be honest, I didn\'t get the exact meaning of an immaterial possession. I have no idea about whether you use the expression \"immaterial\" to mean unimportant or abstract.
Therefore, I\'m just going to write about possession I\'m proud of. I hope you understand.
I have bronze trophy I got from Cheil worldwide which is the Korean leading company in the field of advertising. Every year, Cheil throws a contest for college students to compete with their advertising planning ability. our team submitted 8 works in total and got awarded from one of them. I\'m so proud of the bronze trophy because I feel like it\'s the evidence of my ability as an advertising person. I decorated my desk with that trophy and every moment I see it, I\'m really satisfied. Someday, I want to decorate my desk with another trophy I will get for global advertising awards like Cannes Lions or New York Festival.
강사 첨삭
Hello there [이름]!
Thank you for trying to clarify the meaning of \"immaterial\" from the question I\'ve asked you on your homework.
In my question\'s context, it meant \"something not physical/ not a thing you own. In short, immaterial meant \"not a material\" thing you possess.
Thus, with your composition below, it can still be considered immaterial when you talked about \"pride\", \"honor\", \"glory\" and the like, with the trophy representing your advertising, planning, and marketing abilities and strategies and what you have achieved through them.
Next time, I will be more accurate with my vocabulary in asking questions. Pardon me for using the term \"immaterial\" ambiguously.
I am grateful to see you here on this site. I hope to read more from you soon.
Go over the sentences below and spot some suggestions I made.
See you in class on Wednesday, [이름]!
-T. Donna =)
>> ...I have no idea whether you used the expression \"immaterial\" to mean unimportant or abstract.
Therefore, I\'m just going to write about possession I\'m proud of.
Therefore, I\'m just going to write about possession I\'m proud of.
>> Therefore, I\'m just going to write about a possession that I\'m proud of.
I hope you understand.
>> Correct!
I have bronze trophy I got from Cheil worldwide which is the Korean leading company in the field of advertising.
I have bronze trophy I got from Cheil worldwide which is the Korean leading company in the field of advertising.
>> I have a bronze trophy that I got from Cheil worldwide which is the Korean leading company in the field of advertising.
Every year, Cheil throws a contest for college students to compete with their advertising planning ability.
>> Every year, Cheil throws a contest for college students to compete with their advertising planning abilities.
our team submitted 8 works in total and got awarded from one of them.
>> Our team submitted 8 entries in total and we got awarded from one of them.
I\'m so proud of the bronze trophy because I feel like it\'s the evidence of my ability as an advertising person.
>> Correct!
>> I decorated my desk with that trophy and every moment I see it, I\'m really proud of my accomplishment.
Someday, I want to decorate my desk with another trophy I will get for global advertising awards like Cannes Lions or New York Festival.
>> Someday, I want to decorate my desk with another trophy I will get from a global advertising awards like the Cannes Lions or the New York Festival.
파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.