About electricity
학생이 쓴 원문
Electricity is one of the mankind's best inventions which had changed the world. It is affected all areas of human livings. We don't have any areas where we don't use electricity. When I was a young, I had lived in country. There was not the electricity. I burned the tree to make a meal with the rice, and light a kerosene to read a book. Kerosene is a traditional Korean lantern. When I was a 6th grade in elementary school, the electricity were turned on first in county. It is nearly 50 years ago. Since then, the country had changed perfectly. Of course, it was turned on the light by electricity in city. Electricity provided the convenience of all my life. It provided to me the light to study and can be make a meal instead of trees. Whereas it is taken away the night. It changed the night into the bright world. The boundary between day and night is disappeared. If the electricity turned off all family, it said that 'the wold of darkness'. Originally, night was the darkness.
강사 첨삭
Hi there [이름]!
I lived in the countryside for 12 years. I experienced having no electricity and using kerosene lamps too. I remember using firewood to cook rice also. The coming of electricity in our little village is very much welcomed because the people had been waiting for it for years. Here\'s to electricity and it\'s inventor! Cheers!
Take care!
~T. Lynn
Electricity is one of the mankind\'s best inventions which had changed the world.
>> Electricity is one of mankind\'s best inventions which had changed the world.
It is affected all areas of human livings.
>> It affected all areas of human living.
We don\'t have any areas where we don\'t use electricity.
>> correct!
When I was a young, I had lived in the countryside.
>> correct!
There was not the electricity.
>> There was no electricity.
I burned the tree to make a meal with the rice, and light a kerosene to read a book.
>> I burned wood to make a meal with the rice, and light a kerosene to read a book.
Kerosene is a traditional Korean lantern.
>> Traditional Korean lantern uses kerosene.
When I was a 6th grade in elementary school, the electricity were turned on first in county.
>> When I was in 6th grade in elementary school, electricity were turned on first in the countryside.
It is nearly 50 years ago.
>> correct!
Since then, the country had changed perfectly.
>> correct!
Of course, it was turned on the light by electricity in city.
>> Of course, light was turned on by using electricity in the city.
Electricity provided the convenience of all my life.
>> Electricity provided us with all the convenience of life.
It provided to me the light to study and can be make a meal instead of trees.
>> It provides me the light to study and can be make a meal instead of firewood.
Whereas it is taken away the night.
>> It has also taken away the dark night.
It changed the night into the bright world.
>> It changed the night into a bright world.
The boundary between day and night is disappeared.
>> The boundary between day and night disappeared.
If the electricity turned off all family, it said that \'the wold of darkness\'. Originally, night was the darkness.
>> If everybody turn off electricity, it said that it is \'the wold of darkness\'. Originally, night was the world of darkness.
I lived in the countryside for 12 years. I experienced having no electricity and using kerosene lamps too. I remember using firewood to cook rice also. The coming of electricity in our little village is very much welcomed because the people had been waiting for it for years. Here\'s to electricity and it\'s inventor! Cheers!
Take care!
~T. Lynn
Electricity is one of the mankind\'s best inventions which had changed the world.
>> Electricity is one of mankind\'s best inventions which had changed the world.
It is affected all areas of human livings.
>> It affected all areas of human living.
We don\'t have any areas where we don\'t use electricity.
>> correct!
When I was a young, I had lived in the countryside.
>> correct!
There was not the electricity.
>> There was no electricity.
I burned the tree to make a meal with the rice, and light a kerosene to read a book.
>> I burned wood to make a meal with the rice, and light a kerosene to read a book.
Kerosene is a traditional Korean lantern.
>> Traditional Korean lantern uses kerosene.
When I was a 6th grade in elementary school, the electricity were turned on first in county.
>> When I was in 6th grade in elementary school, electricity were turned on first in the countryside.
It is nearly 50 years ago.
>> correct!
Since then, the country had changed perfectly.
>> correct!
Of course, it was turned on the light by electricity in city.
>> Of course, light was turned on by using electricity in the city.
Electricity provided the convenience of all my life.
>> Electricity provided us with all the convenience of life.
It provided to me the light to study and can be make a meal instead of trees.
>> It provides me the light to study and can be make a meal instead of firewood.
Whereas it is taken away the night.
>> It has also taken away the dark night.
It changed the night into the bright world.
>> It changed the night into a bright world.
The boundary between day and night is disappeared.
>> The boundary between day and night disappeared.
If the electricity turned off all family, it said that \'the wold of darkness\'. Originally, night was the darkness.
>> If everybody turn off electricity, it said that it is \'the wold of darkness\'. Originally, night was the world of darkness.
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