Another homework :^)

2012-07-27 · 첨삭 강사 karen

학생이 쓴 원문

Why hello Karen! I guess I've said "hello" to you several times. Haha anyway today's question is "What inspires you to be better." I'm very interested in art - especially climt(I don't know this spelling is right) who painted "The kiss" and in the field of modern art like Pablo Picasso- and in movie related to psychology,showing their thought by putting fresh new expressions and methods into their films, such as "Black swan","Inception","Eternal sunshine" etc. Those things make me inspire to be better, when I watch them,I think "What the hell I'm doing? I have to be more harder because people have been hard in the every moment to make their own creative things in the world when I've been such a lazy couch potato chips sitting before TV." I can't be genius like them but at least I can be desiruos in my works and studies.So watching my favorite art and movie give me inspiration to be harder in my life. Have a nice weekend and see you next week!

강사 첨삭

A fantastic job as usual SangHwa!!! 

Thanks for making your composition. I really do love your answer. ^^ You are right, art also includes movies, not only drawings and pictures. It is good to have various interests because it keeps things interesting. ^__^ I admit that sometimes I am also a couch potato, a really big one hahaha. Your own answer inspired me to work harder. Anyway, have a happy weekend! Keep safe ^__^

~t.Karen (>.^__^<)

Why hello Karen!

>> Correct! ^^ 

I guess I\'ve said \"hello\" to you several times.

>> Correct! ^^ 

Haha anyway today\'s question is \"What inspires you to be better.\"

>> Anyway , today\'s question is , \"What inspired you to be better?\". 

>> ** Use a comma [ , ] in your sentence to separate: Introductory words (Anyway) and tittles in quotation marks .

>> ** Use a question mark [ ? ] to end interrogative statements. 

>> ** End your sentence with a punctuation mark, in your sentence, it\'s a period [ . ].

I\'m very interested in art - especially climt(I don\'t know this spelling is right) who painted \"The kiss\" and in the field of modern art like Pablo Picasso- and in movie related to psychology,showing their thought by putting fresh new expressions and methods into their films, such as \"Black swan\",\"Inception\",\"Eternal sunshine\" etc.

>>   I\'m very interested in art - especially Klimt (I don\'t know if this spelling is right) ,  who painted  \"The kiss\"  and modern art like those made by Pablo Picasso. I also like movies related to psychology, showing their thought by putting fresh new expressions and methods into their films, such as \"Black swan\",\"Inception\",\"Eternal sunshine\" etc.

>> ** It is better to separate your sentences so it will be easier to understand.

>> ** Remove the words \"In the field of \" because it would already be redundant. \"Modern Art\" is understood to be a field or a form of art. 

>> ** Add the statement \"Like those made by Pablo Picasso\", because if you don\'t add this, your sentence would mean that Pablo Picasso himself is modern art, not his works. 

>> ** Use the conjunction \"If\" in your sentence  (I don\'t know if this spelling is right) to complete the thought of your sentence. 

Those things make me inspire to be better, when I watch them,I think \"What the hell I\'m doing? I have to be more harder because people have been hard in the every moment to make their own creative things in the world when I\'ve been such a lazy couch potato chips sitting before TV.\"

>> Those things inspire me to be better .  When I watch them, I think,  \"What the hell am I doing? I have to work harder because people have been working hard  all the time to produce their own creative art in the world while I\'ve been such a lazy couch potato sitting before the TV.\"

>> ** It is better to separate your sentences so it will be easier to understand.

>> ** It\'s better to say \"Work hard\" because when you say \"Be hard\", you are referring to your body getting physically hard. 

>> ** The idiom is actually: \"Couch potato\" not \"Couch potato chip\". 

I can\'t be genius like them but at least I can be desiruos in my works and studies.

>> I can\'t be a genius like them , but at least I can be desirous in my works and studies.

>> ** Be careful with your spelling: \"Desirous\". 

So watching my favorite art and movie give me inspiration to be harder in my life.

>>  So watching my favorite art and movie gives me inspiration to work harder in  life.

>> ** It\'s better to say \"Work hard\" because when you say \"Be hard\", you are referring to your body getting physically hard. 

>> ** Check your subject verb agreement. If you have a singular subject your verb should have \"S\" at the end. Example:

a. She workS hard.

b. The man loveS his wife. 

Have a nice weekend and see you next week!

>> Correct! ^^ 

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