Avoid watching news is the way to lose our stress.
학생이 쓴 원문
Watching the news is very important to me. I’m a director in a company. So, when I manage that, I need lots of information related to my business. I usually get lots of information from customers, or by the internet, or by watching news programs.
But when I watched the news by TV, sometimes, I felt stressful because the news ware really bad news those are a violence, a war, even fake news, or too biased news like that
sometimes, too repetitive news, even the news was important.
And then, I usually changed the channel
I think the news is important and necessary but we have to live our life
A lot of the news has not happened in my life or in my neighborhood.
So we need to know the present age, but we don’t have to worry too much
that’s why, I think avoid watching news is the way to lose our stress.
강사 첨삭
Hello Elliot!
Thank you again for sharing your take on stressful news. I agree with you. Even I, honestly do not watch the news that much anymore. Especially with the spread of fake news, I don\'t even know what to believe anymore.
For today\'s corrections, I am so happy that the corrections reduced a lot! Do observe that again, there are some long sentences which will be better if they are separated into 2. Also, don\'t forget to use periods (.) to end your sentences.
Great job on this one! Keep it up!
-Teacher Violet
Watching the news is very important to me.
>>CORRECT!
I’m a director in a company.
>>CORRECT!
So, when I manage that, I need lots of information related to my business.
>>CORRECT!
I usually get lots of information from customers, or by the internet, or by watching news programs.
>> I usually get lots of information from customers, through the internet, or by watching news programs.
But when I watched the news by TV, sometimes, I felt stressful because the news ware really bad news those are a violence, a war, even fake news, or too biased news like that
sometimes, too repetitive news, even the news was important.
>> But when I watch the news on TV, sometimes, I feel stressed because the news is really bad news about violence, war, even fake news or very biased news. (Do you mean like this? :) )Sometimes, they get repetitive even if the news is important.
And then, I usually changed the channel
>> And then, I usually change the channel.
I think the news is important and necessary but we have to live our life
>> I think the news is important and necessary but we have to live our lives.
A lot of the news has not happened in my life or in my neighborhood.
>>CORRECT!
So we need to know the present age, but we don’t have to worry too much that’s why, I think avoid watching news is the way to lose our stress.
>> So we need to know the present age, but we don’t have to worry too much. That’s why, I think avoiding watching news is one way to lose/reduce our stress.
파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.