Becoming a military officer
학생이 쓴 원문
After one month, I will graduate my school and become a military officer. It\'s quite nervous that I finally become an officer and go to the field. Recently, I tried to think about the virtues that I have to get. First of all, Responsibility is the most important virtue for platoon leader I think. Responsibility can motivate you to lead the group. It can also make the leader love the group. A leader without responsibility is the same with the dead body. Passion is also a great virtue. Passion makes the leader devote to his group. As a result, These virtues are very important to leaders.
강사 첨삭
Hello Charles,
Thank you for taking time to answer this question. It only proves that you really wanted to improve in your English skill. Please do check and take note of the corrections for your improvement. I hope it helped you.
Keep up the good work!
Sincerely,
Teacher Annie (^^)
After one month, I will graduate my school and become a military officer.
>>> After one month, I will graduate from school and become a military officer.
It\'s quite nervous that I finally become an officer and go to the field.
>>> I\'m quite nervous that I will finally become an officer and go to the field.
Recently, I tried to think about the virtues that I have to get.
>>> CORRECT
First of all, Responsibility is the most important virtue for platoon leader I think.
>>> First of all, I think responsibility is the most important virtue of a platoon leader.
Responsibility can motivate you to lead the group.
>>> CORRECT
It can also make the leader love the group.
>>> CORRECT
A leader without responsibility is the same with the dead body.
>>> A leader without responsibility is the same as the dead body.
Passion is also a great virtue.
>>> CORRECT
Passion makes the leader devote to his group.
>>> Passion makes the leader devoted to his group.
As a result, These virtues are very important to leaders.
>>> As a result, these virtues are very important to leaders.
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