Capital punishment is essential to control violence in society. To what extent do you agree or disag
학생이 쓴 원문
Capital punishment is very vital in society. All countries over the world use capital punishment for secure their societies. However, there are other kinds of punishment such as verbal warming, keeping in prison and so one. This essay will discuss whether society needs capital punishment or not and the reason. I believe capital punishment is essential and beneficial in society. These days, people cannot survive without money because it is very important in our lives. Relating money issues are always put it first in people’s lives. Therefore, it can be reason that people afraid to break rule and commit crime, which can be very effective punishment. Many crimes will be reduced and people will keep a rule. The other reason why fine is necessary in society is government can utilize that fine for society, for instance, to help vulnerable people and for victims.In conclusion, capital can be very useful punishment for society not only meaning of protection but also improving quality of societ
강사 첨삭
Hi Ye [이름]!
Let me start by saying that this composition is very well-written.
I just tweaked some patterns here and there but the content was both expressive and relevant.
However, I think that you understood capital punishment in a different way.
Capital punishment is referring to death penalty.
If you would like to give it another try, feel free to do so.
I will gladly read your work again.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
Capital punishment is very vital in society.
>> Capital punishment is vital in society.
All countries over the world use capital punishment for secure their societies.
>> Countries all over the world impose capital punishment to make their society safe and secure.
However, there are other kinds of punishment such as verbal warming, keeping in prison and so one.
>> However, there are other kinds of punishment such as verbal warning, imprisonment and others.
This essay will discuss whether society needs capital punishment or not and the reason.
>> This essay will discuss whether society needs capital punishment or not and the corresponding reasons.
I believe capital punishment is essential and beneficial to society.
>> I believe capital punishment is essential and beneficial in society.
These days, people cannot survive without money because it is very important in our lives.
>> Correct
Relating money issues are always put it first in people’s lives.
>> Issues related to money are always a priority in people\'s lives.
Therefore, it can be reason that people afraid to break rule and commit crime, which can be very effective punishment.
>> Therefore, it could be the reason why people would be afraid to break rules and commit crimes, which can be a very effective punishment.
Many crimes will be reduced and people will keep a rule.
>> Crime rates will go down and people would start following the rules.
The other reason why fine is necessary in society is government can utilize that fine for society, for instance, to help vulnerable people and for victims.
>> Fines could also be an important form of penalty since the money can be used for the betterment of the society like helping vulnerable people and victims of crimes.
In conclusion, capital can be very useful punishment for society not only meaning of protection but also improving quality of society life.
>> In conclusion, capital punishment can be very useful in society which includes protection and improvement of the people\'s quality of life.
I believe money can be the best punishment in terms of effectiveness.
>> Correct
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