Claire\'s Homework
학생이 쓴 원문
강사 첨삭
Thank you for this Claire. Very well said. English is indeed the international language. See you in class!
- T. Beth
English fluency is significant because it\'ll be one of the most crucial elements in achieving my goals; it\'ll widen my sight of the world and increase life quality.
>>> English fluency is significant because it\'ll be one of the most crucial elements in achieving my goals. It\'ll widen my sight of the world and increase life quality.
>>> OR: English fluency is significant because it\'ll be one of the most crucial elements in achieving my goals. It\'ll widen my perspective of the world and increase quality of life.
Firstly, English fluency helps me achieve my goals.
>>> correct
My goal as a student is to study abroad to learn more massive amounts of knowledge.
>>> correct
Generally, most western countries with lots of universities that can provide many possibilities to go out to the world compared to others use English.
>>> correct (Generally, most western countries with lots of universities that can provide many possibilities to go out to the world compared to others, use English. )
Accordingly, English help me achieve my goals.
>>> OR: Accordingly, English would help me achieve my goals.
Secondly, in addition to what I mentioned above, English fluency would widen my sight of the world.
>>> correct
>>> OR: Secondly, as what I mentioned above, English fluency would widen my perspective of the world.
For instance, English helps me communicate with global citizens, which means I can face more new experiences and different cultures worldwide and help me understand many things: understanding books, songs, etc. written in English.
>>> correct
Understanding better also means widening my sights.
>>> OR: Understanding better also means widening my insights. ( INSIGHT- an instance of apprehending the true nature of a thing, especially through intuitive understanding.)
Lastly, English fluency increases the quality of my life.
>>> correct
As much experience I face, the formation of my life gets abundant.
>>> correct
Because English is used as an official language in 83 countries worldwide, the more chances I would get in my life: more extensive job choices, vast traveling places choices, meeting lots of different types of people, living area choices, etc.
>>> correct
Consequently, English fluency increases the quality of my life.
>>> correct
English fluency is merit in our life that can help me achieve my goals, widen my sight of the world, and increase the quality of my life in many ways.
>>> correct
As shown above, English fluency is a strength that helps me create a part of my life.
>>> correct
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