Composition

Dear my Student [이름],

Good day, too! ^.^

I think I need to learn how to control myself.

I should control my emotions and expressions, especially when I don\'t feel good.

Therefore, you won\'t worry about me.

Don\'t worry.

I am really fine.

Just like what I told you yesterday, I am a string woman.

By the way, I like your composition.

You introduced what people do online.

You gave the differences of online and offline shopping.

Finally, you made your conclusion.

Very good! ^^

You made your writing well. ^^,

Anyway, don\'t forget to see the guides below for your composition\'s further improvement.

I didn\'t put the reasons why some of your sentences are wrong.

I want you to check them well.

If you have some questions about them.

Just be free to reply as soon as you want.

That\'s all for now! ^^

Happy reading! ^^,

See you! ^^.

... Teacher Paula ... ^.~

Dear my Teacher Paula,
>> CORRECT!

Good day.
>> CORRECT!

>> BETTER: Good day!

How do you feel now?
>> CORRECT!

Because of your bad condition, I am worried about you until now.
>> CORRECT!

Generally, if your tonsil is swollen up, you really should see a doctor and be prescribed antibiotics.
>> Generally, if your tonsils swell up, you really should see a doctor and be prescribed antibiotics.

My boyfriend also has been sick to his tonsil before, but he didn\'t take any pills.
>> My boyfriend also has been sick due to his tonsils before, but he didn\'t take any pills.

It is because he thought taking antibiotics is not good for his health, so his condition was getting poor at that time.
>> It is because he thought taking antibiotics was not good for his health, so his condition was getting poor at that time.

Therefore, you should not think it lightly.
>> CORRECT!

As what I told you yesterday, your health is the most important thing to you.
>> CORRECT!

I will look forward to seeing you in good health this evening. ^^
>> CORRECT!

>> OR: I will look forward to seeing you in a good condition this evening.

See you!
>> CORRECT!

*Essay

These days, many people do internet shopping.
>> CORRECT!

They can not only buy something chipper than offline shops, but also save their time and efforts because online shops will deliver their goods door to door by couriers.

>> They can not only buy something cheaper there than offline shops, but also save their time and efforts, because online shops will deliver their goods door to door by couriers.

However, in spite of those conveniences, some of the people still shop their necessities on offline shops.
>> However, in spite of those conveniences, some people still shop their necessities offline.

>> OR: However, in spite of those conveniences, some people still purchase their necessities at offline shops.

I have thought of the reasons why some of them still prefer offline shopping.
>> CORRECT!

First, we can\'t see and touch goods in person on the web.
>> CORRECT!

That is a main disadvantage of that.
>> CORRECT!

Without seeing and touching the goods in person, people can\'t trust sellers.
>> CORRECT!

Second, we have to wait 2~3days to receive ordered goods.
>> Second, we have to wait in 2~3 days to receive ordered goods.

>> OR: Second, we have to wait for 2 days to receive ordered goods.

If we need something urgently, we only should purchase it on offline shops.
>> If we need something urgently, we only should purchase it at offline shops.

In conclusion, if those disadvantages don\'t be improved, people\'s shopping patterns also will not be changed in the future.

>> In conclusion, if those disadvantages continue to exist, people\'s shopping patterns also will not be changed in the future.