Composition

2016-08-05 · 첨삭 강사 Erine

학생이 쓴 원문

Good morning, Teacher! I am happy to hear that you are going to go to your hometown with your friend. How exciting it is! I hope that you can make this journey pleasant! By the way, it was very hot last night so I clasped a bottle of frozen water and tried to go to sleep. The thermometer in my house read 34 degrees Celsius last night and my fans blew the hot wind out. In this case, even if there are a lot of fans that I have, it is useless. I think, it is the hottest weather that I have ever experienced. According to the weather forecast, the temperature today will be also very high and even there will be a big possibility for us to experience the higher temperature than what we had yesterday. In this terrible situation, people still can't turn air-conditions on as much as they need because of the electric progressive tax. Our government only gives a benefit of a low rate of electric charges to companies. How unfair it is! Indeed, our government has never considered this hard situation that the public is encountering. I will just pray that this summer goes faster and faster. I will stop here for today and see you on Monday! ^^**

강사 첨삭

Hi, [이름]!
I feel so sorry for you and the other people

who are really experiencing hot weather.

I hope that you won\'t have other medical conditions

because of that weather.

Stay cool, OK?
~~Teacher Erine~~

Good morning, Teacher! 

>> Correct.
 I am happy to hear that you are going to go to your hometown with your friend.

>> Correct. 
 How exciting it is! 

>> Correct. 
 I hope that you can make this journey pleasant!

>> Correct. 
 By the way, it was very hot last night so I clasped a bottle of frozen water and tried to go to sleep. 

>> Correct. 
 The thermometer in my house read 34 degrees Celsius last night and my fans blew the hot wind out. 

>> Correct. [OMG]
 In this case, even if there are a lot of fans that I have, it is useless. 

>> In this case, even if I have a lot of fans, they are useless.

 I think, it is the hottest weather that I have ever experienced.

>> Correct. 
 According to the weather forecast, the temperature today will be also very high and even there will be a big possibility for us to experience the higher temperature than what we had yesterday. 

>> Correct.  
In this terrible situation, people still can\'t turn air-conditions on as much as they need because of the electric progressive tax. 

>> Correct. 
Our government only gives a benefit of a low rate of electric charges to companies. 

>> Our government only gives benefits of a low rate of electric charges to companies. 
 How unfair it is!

>> Correct. 
 Indeed, our government has never considered this hard situation that the public is encountering. 

>> Correct.  
I will just pray that this summer goes faster and faster.

>> Correct. 
 I will stop here for today and see you on Monday! ^^**

>> Correct. 

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