Composition

2016-10-25 · 첨삭 강사 Erine

학생이 쓴 원문

Good afternoon,Teacher! Today, we talked about friendship with male friends. I think the basic relationship with the opposite sex is more on 'a sexual emotion'. Someone said that the relationship with the opposite sex can last for a long time if one of two is romantically interested in the other one. I also agreed with this idea when I was younger. However, as I get old, I have found that it is possible to have a real relationship with male friends and it is more precious than my same sex friends. Sometimes, I feel more comfortable when I meet my male friends. They are not only generous but also don't care about trivial things. Moreover, even if they got married, they still put importance on friendship. I don't want to lose my precious male friends just because of the prejudice that people usually have. That is all for today and see you tomorrow! ^^**

강사 첨삭

Hello, [이름]!
I am impressed with how you say your thoughts.

However, here in our country, the idea of having a friend

of the opposite sex still has this \"romantic love\" although

they are already at their old age. Let me discuss

this one further tomorrow.

~~Teacher Erine~~

Good afternoon,Teacher!

>> Correct
 Today, we talked about friendship with male friends.

>> Correct
 I think the basic relationship with the opposite sex is more on \'a sexual emotion\'.

>> Correct
 Someone said that the relationship with the opposite sex can last for a long time if one of two is romantically interested in the other one. 

>> Correct 
 I also agreed with this idea when I was younger. 

>> Correct 
 However, as I get old, I have found that it is possible to have a real relationship with male friends and it is more precious than my same sex friends. 

>> However, as I get old, I have found out that it is possible to have a real relationship with male friends and it is more precious than my same sex friends. 
 Sometimes, I feel more comfortable when I meet my male friends. 

>> Correct 
 They are not only generous but also don\'t care about trivial things. 

>> Correct  
Moreover, even if they got married, they still put importance on friendship. 

>> Correct 
 I don\'t want to lose my precious male friends just because of the prejudice that people usually have. 

>> Correct 
 That is all for today and see you tomorrow! ^^**

>> Correct 

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