Composition

2016-11-16 · 첨삭 강사 Erine

학생이 쓴 원문

Good morning, Teacher! Today, we talked about social obligations depending on sex. Regardless of sex, we should feel responsible for the social obligations. For examples, It would be better not to use disposable cups when we drink a cup of coffee. If we find that a faucet is turned on in a public place, we should turn it off. We should participate in the 10th-day-no-driving system to get rid of a traffic jam. If there is a fire happening in somewhere, we should call 119. As being one of social members, those above are considered as basic social obligations but it is true that there are a lot of people who don't follow them just because of inconvenience. In order to have a brighter future, it is not too much to say that we should emphasize a strong sense of community. That is all for today and see you tomorrow! ^^

강사 첨삭

Hello, [이름]!
I think social obligations are also accompanied

by discipline. If a person is not disciplined enough,

the person wouldn\'t be aware of the common social

obligations we have.

See you then!
~~Teacher Erine~~

Good morning, Teacher!

>> Correct
 Today, we talked about social obligations depending on sex. 

>> Correct
 Regardless of sex, we should feel responsible for the social obligations. 

>>  Regardless of sex, we should feel responsible for any social obligations. 
 For examples, 

>> Correct
 It would be better not to use disposable cups when we drink a cup of coffee.

>> Correct
 If we find that a faucet is turned on in a public place, we should turn it off. 

>>  If we find a faucet turned on in a public place, we should turn it off. 
 We should participate in the 10th-day-no-driving system to get rid of a traffic jam.

>> Correct
 If there is a fire happening in somewhere, we should call 119. 

>>  If there is fire happening somewhere, we should call 119. 
 As being one of social members, those above are considered as basic social obligations but it is true that there are a lot of people who don\'t follow them just because of inconvenience. 

>>  As one of the social members, those things above are considered as basic social obligations but it is true that there are a lot of people who don\'t follow them just because of inconvenience. 
 In order to have a brighter future, it is not too much to say that we should emphasize a strong sense of community. 

>> Correct
 That is all for today and see you tomorrow! ^^

>> Correct

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