cover letter
학생이 쓴 원문
강사 첨삭
Hi Ms. [Name]! ^^
Good evening!
Your cover letter is a good start.
I corrected minimal errors in terms of grammar.
However, I have also included a suggested content of your cover letter based form yours.
Check it out below. :)
T. Glenda
I would like to express my sincere interest in the Recovery team leader position at IKEA.
>> I would like to express my sincere interest in the Recovery team leader position in your company.
The IKEA offers the perfect environment in which to pursue my goal of contributing to the business industry since it will allow me greater exposure to new experiences and opportunities for understanding the field of furniture industry.
>> Your company offers the perfect environment in which I can pursue my goal of contributing to the business industry since it will allow me a greater exposure to new experiences and opportunities for understanding the field of furniture industry.
I am ready to go the extra mile and be an integral part of IKEA team
>> I am ready to go the extra mile and be an integral part of your team.
To give you a brief personal background, I majored in Interior architecture and spent the past 4 years in a retail store which is branch of the Interior company, hoping to change people’s lives in some way like recommending wall paper and the color of flooring.
>> To give you a brief personal background, I majored in Interior architecture and I spent the past 4 years in one of the branches retail store of the Interior company. Hoping to change people’s lives in some way, I gave recommendations on wall paper designs and the color of flooring.
Soon, I realized interior is not only wall paper and flooring but also furniture is important more than others.
>> Soon, I realized interior design is not only about the wall paper and flooring but also the furniture is as important.
So I am currently working in design Furniture Company as designer. However I realize drawing plan in the office did not fit my outgoing personality
>>So, I am currently working in a Furniture Company as a designer. However I realize drawing plan in the office did not fit my outgoing personality.
Dear ___________________,
I would like to express my sincere interest in the Recovery team leader position in your company.
Your company offers the perfect environment in which I can pursue my goal of contributing to the business industry since it will allow me a greater exposure to new experiences and opportunities for understanding the field of furniture industry.
To give you a brief personal background, my education and experience includes a degree in Interior architecture and a 4 year experience in the interior design industry. I worked in one of the branches of my previous company as an interior designer. Hoping to change people’s lives in some way, I gave recommendations on wall paper designs and the color of flooring.
In this time, I have maintained up to date knowledge about interior design along with new trends in the field. This has allowed me to have the ability to analyze customer needs and recommend appropriate wall paper design and flooring as well as answering customer queries. Realizing that interior design is not only about the wall paper and flooring but also the furniture is as important.
With that being said, I am currently working in a furniture company as a designer. However, I want to expand my professional experience in the furniture industry not only a designer but as a team leader. With my outgoing personality and great communication skills, I believe that I can coordinate with other departments to establish strategies to maximize the company\'s sales and profitability.
I am eagerly looking forward for an opportunity to be a part of your team.
I welcome the opportunity to discuss this position and my qualifications with you further. Thank you for your consideration.
Sincerely,
_____________________
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