Day 1 Write something about yourself
학생이 쓴 원문
Write something about yourself. Use the following sentence patterns.
Hello, my name is [이름] [이름] but you can just call me Gigi.
I have my bachelor’s degree in Design Engineering and also recently graduated from college with diploma in Interactive Media Design.
I\'ve worked as a media designer in Private high school, but now I\'m looking forward jumping into new career path.
강사 첨삭
Hey there, Ms. [이름]! That was a clear and well-organized introduction. You explained your education and work experience smoothly, and your ideas were easy to follow. To make it sound even more natural for OPIc, you could add a bit more detail about what you actually did as a media designer or explain why you want to change your career path. Overall, it was a strong and confident response; just try to expand your answers a little more to reach a higher level.
~T. Jenna
Hello, my name is [이름] [이름] but you can just call me Gigi.
>>Correct
I have my bachelor’s degree in Design Engineering and also recently graduated from college with diploma in Interactive Media Design.
I have my bachelor’s degree in Design Engineering and also recently graduated from college with diploma in Interactive Media Design.
>>I have a bachelor’s degree in Design Engineering and also recently graduated from college with a diploma in Interactive Media Design.
I\'ve worked as a media designer in Private high school, but now I\'m looking forward jumping into new career path.
I\'ve worked as a media designer in Private high school, but now I\'m looking forward jumping into new career path.
>>I\'ve worked as a media designer in a private high school, but now I am looking forward to jumping into a new career path.
***
Hello, my name is [이름] [이름], but you can call me Gigi. I have a bachelor’s degree in Design Engineering, and I recently earned a diploma in Interactive Media Design. Previously, I worked as a media designer in a private high school, where I was responsible for creating various visual materials and digital content. These days, I’m getting ready to explore a new career path that better reflects my passion and future aspirations.
파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.