Do you think air pollution will be a bigger issue ten years from now or not?
학생이 쓴 원문
Air pollution would not be a bigger issue ten years from now. Of course, air pollution has been a more significant issue already; not ten years later; NOW! Burning fossil fuels, releasing carbon dioxide, methane gases, and other chemical gases into the air, etc have caused air pollution in recent days. We must seriously think about this issue. The atmosphere is divided into five layers; exosphere, thermosphere, mesosphere, stratosphere, and troposphere. Especially, weather that affects our day-to-day lives on earth occurs in the troposphere. This is the lowest region of the atmosphere, and it extends 13 kilometers above the surface of the earth. But air pollution has affected the troposphere which becomes weaker and thinner. So, the sunlight becomes stronger, and the earth has been heating. This is the cause of global warming. Air pollution is not just a problem in our daily life. This is the main reason for the process of all destruction of nature. We must go back to the past.
강사 첨삭
You did well adding a lot of factual information in your essay, Su A! You made a good point about air pollution being a major issue that we\'ve already been facing nowadays. Including a variety of statistics in your essay helps educate your readers to become more aware about the problems brought by global warming. As for my suggestion, you can also end your essay with words of encouragement that will motivate and inspire your readers to contribute to the efforts being made to lessen the destruction of air pollution. ^^ Thank you, Su A!
~T.Harmony <3
>> CORRECT!
Of course, air pollution has been a more significant issue already; not ten years later; NOW!
>> CORRECT!
Burning fossil fuels, releasing carbon dioxide, methane gases, and other chemical gases into the air, etc have caused air pollution in recent days.
>> CORRECT!
We must seriously think about this issue.
>> CORRECT!
OR>> We must take this issue seriously and ponder on it.
The atmosphere is divided into five layers; exosphere, thermosphere, mesosphere, stratosphere, and troposphere.
>> CORRECT!
Especially, weather that affects our day-to-day lives on earth occurs in the troposphere.
>> In particular, the weather that...
This is the lowest region of the atmosphere, and it extends 13 kilometers above the surface of the earth.
>> CORRECT!
But air pollution has affected the troposphere which becomes weaker and thinner.
>> CORRECT!
OR>> ...which has become weaker and thinner.
So, the sunlight becomes stronger, and the earth has been heating.
>> ..., and the Earth has been suffering from strong heatwaves.
This is the cause of global warming.
>> CORRECT!
OR>> This is the consequence of global warming.
Air pollution is not just a problem in our daily life.
>> CORRECT!
This is the main reason for the process of all destruction of nature.
>> CORRECT!
We must go back to the past.
>> CORRECT!
OR>> We must return to the past.
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