Do you think everyone deserves happiness? Why?
학생이 쓴 원문
Absolutely, Everyone deserves happiness. Because God made people. (I really appreciate to you. Because I can\'t tell my stories without God\'s working. Fortunately, we believe same God. So I can do straightforward conversations.) God wants that people are happy. In Genesis, The Lord God said, \"It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him\" Like this, He gave Adam to Eve for sharing their happiness. After that, He said \"It looked really good\" That is his loving. God made Adam, Eve and everyone. We are his children. Because God is glad, we who are his sons and daughters deserve happiness.
강사 첨삭
Hi Ji[이름], you did very well expressing your thoughts and faith in your writing. I can see how sincere and meaningful your sentences are. Just be mindful of grammar details such as capitalization (especially \"God\" and \"His\"), sentence connections (avoid starting too many sentences with \"Because\"), and word choices like \"God\'s work\" instead of \"God\'s working.\" Overall, your ideas are very clear, heartfelt, and beautifully connected to your belief. Keep practicing so your sentences flow more smoothly and naturally. Don\'t hesitate to ask questions regarding your homework output. Thank you!
~ T. Lia
Absolutely, Everyone deserves happiness. Because God made people.
>> Absolutely, everyone deserves happiness because God made people.
(I really appreciate to you. Because I can\'t tell my stories without God\'s working. Fortunately, we believe same God. So I can do straightforward conversations.)
>> (I really appreciate you because I can\'t tell my stories without God\'s work. Fortunately, we believe in the same God, so I can have straightforward conversations).
God wants that people are happy.
>> God wants people to be happy.
In Genesis, The Lord God said, \"It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him\"
>> In Genesis, the Lord God said, \"It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.\"
Like this, He gave Adam to Eve for sharing their happiness.
>> In this way, He gave Adam to Eve so they could share their happiness.
After that, He said \"It looked really good\" That is his loving.
>> After that, He said, \"It looked really good.\" That shows His love.
God made Adam, Eve and everyone.
>> CORRECT
We are his children. Because God is glad, we who are his sons and daughters deserve happiness.
>> We are His children. Because God is glad, we, His sons and daughters, deserve happiness.
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