Do you think our interests may change depending on our sensibilities?

2025-11-04 · 첨삭 강사 Polly

학생이 쓴 원문

I think our interests may change depending on our sensibilities. Before I stared dating, I was interested in reading books and watching dramas about romantic comedies. However, after I realized that it\'s impossible to fall in love with like dramas, I\'ve come to prefer thrillers, instead. After I entered university, I\'ve come to like outdoor activites, such as going to amusement parks and traveling, because I felt relaxed because I got away from study stress. However, when I prepared for tests and interviews for a job, I was interested in taking a walk and meditating to relieve my stress. In conclusion, interests and mindset are easy to change according to environment. Therefore, I would like to create my environment I can be relaxed and easygoing.

강사 첨삭

Hi, [이름]!
You expressed your ideas clearly and gave great examples to show how your interests have changed over time. Very thoughtful reflection! Your paragraph is well-organized and shows maturity in how you understand yourself. Just be careful with small grammar points like “stared” → “started” and sentence transitions for smoother flow. Keep up the wonderful writing and self-awareness!
~Teacher Polly

I think our interests may change depending on our sensibilities.
>>CORRECT

Before I stared dating, I was interested in reading books and watching dramas about romantic comedies.
>>Before I started dating, I was interested in reading books and watching romantic comedies.

However, after I realized that it\'s impossible to fall in love with like dramas, I\'ve come to prefer thrillers, instead.
>>However, after realizing that falling in love doesn’t happen like in dramas, I began to prefer thrillers instead.

After I entered university, I\'ve come to like outdoor activites, such as going to amusement parks and traveling, because I felt relaxed because I got away from study stress.
>>When I entered university, I started to enjoy outdoor activities such as going to amusement parks and traveling because they helped me relax and get away from study stress.

However, when I prepared for tests and interviews for a job, I was interested in taking a walk and meditating to relieve my stress.
>>Later, when I was preparing for exams and job interviews, I became more interested in simple activities like walking and meditating to relieve stress.

In conclusion, interests and mindset are easy to change according to environment.
>>In conclusion, our interests and mindset can easily change depending on our environment.

Therefore, I would like to create my environment I can be relaxed and easygoing.
>>Therefore, I want to create an environment where I can feel relaxed and easygoing.

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