Do you think that religion is important?

2022-07-21 · 첨삭 강사 Elise

학생이 쓴 원문

I always say it\'s not important to believe in a religion. I guess it\'s a freedom whether believe in or not, but no one can force you to believe in religion. Why I think like this, there are many religious activities to believe in God or come to church in South Korea. So I still don\'t like it.

강사 첨삭

Hi Elic :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I\'m so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I always say it\'s not important to believe in a religion. 
>> I always say that it\'s not important to believe in religion. 
 
I guess it\'s a freedom whether believe in or not, but no one can force you to believe in religion. 
>> I guess it\'s a form of freedom so no one should force you to believe  in a religion.

Why I think like this, there are many religious activities to believe in God or come to church in South Korea. 
>> The reason why I think like is because there are many religious activities in South Korea so I don\'t like it. 

So I still don\'t like it.
>> CONNECT WITH THE SENTENCE ABOVE. 

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