Do you think you are aging gracefully?
학생이 쓴 원문
According to development of mesical technology, people can live longer than before.
Thus, aging population has became a serious problem in South Korea. Including me, people should think about that hiw can we get old gracedully?
In my opinion, aging gracefully is being open mind to young
people.
I stronly believe that if I am open mind person, I can become more generous, careful and beautiful.
Now I am trying to be awakened and believe that It makes me age gracefully in the future.
강사 첨삭
Hello Young Won!
I agree that aging gracefully is smiling, being kind, embracing age better than yesterday. Along with wisdom, we are more at peace and try to be the light in dark situations.
We cannot deny the fact that your country is growing old literally with its people. We can only hope that this can find a good solution soon.
I would like to thank you for all your great efforts in crafting a composition always.
See you soon!
-T. Donna =)
>> According to developments of medical technology, people can live longer than before.
Thus, aging population has became a serious problem in South Korea. Including me, people should think about that hiw can we get old gracedully?
In my opinion, aging gracefully is being open mind to young
people.
>> Thus, aging population has became a serious problem in South Korea. Including me, people should think about how we can get old gracefully.
In my opinion, aging gracefully is being open-mind to youngpeople.
I stronly believe that if I am open mind person, I can become more generous, careful and beautiful.
>> I strongly believe that if I am an open-mind person, I can become more generous, careful, and beautiful.
Now I am trying to be awakened and believe that It makes me age gracefully in the future.
>> Correct!
Or: ...that it makes...
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