Does smoking give you a better image or make you look more sophisticated?

2015-04-16 · 첨삭 강사 Nina

학생이 쓴 원문

It sounds ridiculous to me that smoking makes you look more sophisticated or gives you a better image. I personally have never been impressed by the advertisements that depict smoking as intellectual, glamorous and attractive. A man or a woman who is smoking looks like he/she has fallen behind the times, given the situation where more and more people try to quit smoking these days. However, the scene of smoking by a famous movie star or a celebrity might look sexy and attractive to young children because they are not mature enough to be aware of how serious it is to their health. They do not have insights about the aftermath of smoking, either. There are still few people around me who are still smoking. The typical question they are facing from their colleagues when they smoke is “are you still smoking?” He/she might be treated as a person who doesn’t have a strong will to control himself. Smoking can harm not only you, but also your family and the people around you. Be smart.

강사 첨삭

Good day Sir [이름]. ^^

Thank you very much for sending your essay today.

Yes, smoking is really harmful.

Maybe those people who are still smoking can\'t get rid of that bad habit.

Hopefully, they will be able to quit soon.

Talk to you soon.

Teacher Nina

It sounds ridiculous to me that smoking makes you look more sophisticated or gives you a better image.

>> correct

I personally have never been impressed by the advertisements that depict smoking as intellectual, glamorous and attractive.

>> correct

A man or a woman who is smoking looks like he/she has fallen behind the times, given the situation where more and more people try to quit smoking these days.

>> correct

>> A man or a woman who is smoking looks like he/she has fallen behind the times, given the situation where number of people try to quit smoking is increasing these days.

However, the scene of smoking by a famous movie star or a celebrity might look sexy and attractive to young children because they are not mature enough to be aware of how serious it is to their health.

>> correct

They do not have insights about the aftermath of smoking, either.

>> correct

There are still few people around me who are still smoking.

>> correct

The typical question they are facing from their colleagues when they smoke is “are you still smoking?”

>> correct

He/she might be treated as a person who doesn’t have a strong will to control himself.

>> correct

Smoking can harm not only you, but also your family and the people around you. Be smart.

>> correct

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