Does technology change your quality of life?

2015-03-12 · 첨삭 강사 Kelly

학생이 쓴 원문

Compared with the primative age, the world has been changed surprisingly thanks to the technological advancement. I also gain benefits from this change. Particularly, with the advent of the computer, my quality of life has been improved. With the computer, I can do many things such as shopping, working out, and studying. I often do online shopping because I can make a purchase the same product with more cheaper than offline store and I do not need to go around to compare product that each store is selling. When I work out, I use the computer. I like working out outside, but usually I exercise at home by emulating exercise video. As a result, I can save my time and do another thing. The computer is also useful to study. By using various software programs, I can process my homework. Besides, when I do not understand the lecture well, I can compesate for the lecture with e-learning. Like this, devlopment of technology has transformed and affected my life positively.

강사 첨삭

Good morning Miss [이름]! I agree with your statement that technology has helped us in a lot of ways. Our lives became more convenient because of it. But we should not depend our lives to it. Have a good day! ~Kelly^^ Compared with the primative age, the world has been changed surprisingly thanks to the technological advancement. >> Compared with the primative age, the world has been changed surprisingly, thanks to the advancement of technology. I also gain benefits from this change. >> Correct. Particularly, with the advent of the computer, my quality of life has been improved. >> Correct.  With the computer, I can do many things such as shopping, working out, and studying. >> With computer, I can do many things such as shopping, working out, and studying. I often do online shopping because I can make a purchase the same product with more cheaper than offline store and I do not need to go around to compare product that each store is selling. >> I often do online shopping because I can purchase items at a cheaper price and I do not need to go around different stores to compare a product that each store is selling. When I work out, I use the computer. >> I also watch workout videos on the computer when exercising. I like working out outside, but usually I exercise at home by emulating exercise video. >> I like working out outside, but usually, I exercise at home by emulating exercise videos. As a result, I can save my time and do another thing. >> Correct. The computer is also useful to study. >> The computer is also useful for studies. By using various software programs, I can process my homework. >> Correct. Besides, when I do not understand the lecture well, I can compesate for the lecture with e-learning. >> Correct.Like this, devlopment of technology has transformed and affected my life positively. >> Because of those reasons, the devlopment of technology has transformed and affected my life positively.

파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.

다른 영어첨삭교정 보기

영어첨삭교정 ·