essay about \"what animal do I like\"

2021-11-24 · 첨삭 강사 Roanne

학생이 쓴 원문

I do like animals, especially animals who has a lot of point of contacts. I like dog the best because dogs are friendly and warm, and they don\'t hurt you on purpose except some situations. And dogs are loyal to their owners, even if the owner make them feel terrible, dogs still love their owner. That\'s the sad part, I once saw a news about the Jindo dog Paekku\'s story. Jindo dog Paekku was born in the 1988, at the Jindo island\'s resident, grandmother park bokdan. at 1993 grandmother park bokdan sold Paekku to a person who lives at daegeon, Paekku had sold to another owner, but Paekku didn\'t forgot his owner, grandmother park bokdan. So, paekku had returned to his house and met his owner again! thinking that it takes 5 hours (using train)going to Jindo at daegeon! another thing about my favortie animal, my favorite animal was Jindo dog before we brought Choco who is cockerspainel, now, my fovorite animal is cockerspainel!!

강사 첨삭

Hello, Yoon [이름]!

Oh, what a nice answer you have here! Dogs are really one of the best pets you can have.

Thank you for sharing! 

~T. Roanne ^_^
===========================================
I do like animals, especially animals who has a lot of point of contacts.
>> I do like animals, especially animals who have a lot of points of contacts.
I like dog the best because dogs are friendly and warm, and they don\'t hurt you on purpose except some situations.
>> I like the dog the best because dogs are friendly and warm, and they don\'t hurt you on purpose except any situations.
And dogs are loyal to their owners, even if the owner make them feel terrible, dogs still love their owner.
>> And dogs are loyal to their owners, even if the owner makes them feel terrible, dogs still love their owners.
That\'s the sad part, I once saw a news about the Jindo dog Paekku\'s story.
>> Correct! 
Jindo dog Paekku was born in the 1988, at the Jindo island\'s resident, grandmother park bokdan.
>> Jindo dog, Paekku was born in the 1988, at the Jindo island\'s resident, grandmother Park Bokdan.
at 1993 grandmother park bokdan sold Paekku to a person who lives at daegeon.
>> In 1993, grandmother Park Bokdan sold Paekku to a person who lives in Daejeon.
Paekku had sold to another owner, but Paekku didn\'t forgot his owner, grandmother park bokdan.
>>Paekku was sold to another owner, but Paekku didn\'t forgot his owner, grandmother Park Bokdan.
So, paekku had returned to his house and met his owner again!
>> Correct! 
thinking that it takes 5 hours (using train)going to Jindo at daegeon!
>>Thinking that it takes 5 hours using train going to Jindo from daegeon!
another thing about my favortie animal, my favorite animal was Jindo dog before we brought Choco who is cockerspainel,
>> Another thing about my favorite animal, my favorite animal was a Jindo dog before we brought Choco who is a cocker spaniel. 
now, my fovorite animal is cockerspainel!!
>> Now, my favorite animal is a cocker spaniel. 

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