ESSAY: Can money buy happiness?
학생이 쓴 원문
Thesedays, due to industry development, modern people usually consider that money is important and also dispute whether money can buy happiness or not. I strongly believe that money ensure own\'s happiness.
Some people argue that money is not the number one priority in life since people could enjoy their life without wealth. For example, a couple who have worked their whole life in a small store donated all of their wealth for students. The contributors said that it make them happy.
It seems that there are several important factors about happiness, and I think that the most essential factor is money. According to an article, scientists displayed interesting result about the question that if people can choose among money,status, and love to acquire happiness. Interestingly, 68% of respondents choosed money. It shows lots of people believe that money can make happy.
This is no doubt that a mammonisam is not nice phenomenon. Nevertheless, money is likely to ensure happiness.
강사 첨삭
Hello Kelly! Nice composition! Thank you for sending.
~ T. Irene ~
These days, due to industry development, modern people usually consider that money is important and also dispute whether money can buy happiness or not.
>>> These days, due to industrial development, modern people usually consider money important. Moreover, they also argue whether money can buy happiness or not.
I strongly believe that money ensure own\'s happiness.
>>> I strongly believe that money can ensure one\'s own happiness.
Some people argue that money is not the number one priority in life since people could enjoy their life without wealth.
>>> Some people argue that money should not be one\'s number one priority since people can be happy without being rich.
For example, a couple who have worked their whole life in a small store donated all of their wealth for students.
>>> A good example of this is the couple who had worked their whole life running a small store then donated all of their wealth to help students.
The contributors said that it make them happy.
>>> The donors said that it made them happy.
It seems that there are several important factors about happiness, and I think that the most essential factor is money.
>>> It seems that there are several important factors contributing to happiness, and I think that the most essential contributor is money.
According to an article, scientists displayed interesting result about the question that if people can choose among money,status, and love to acquire happiness.
>>> According to an article, scientists made an interesting research on what people will choose from money, status, and love in order to acquire happiness.
Interestingly, 68% of respondents choosed money.
>>> Interestingly, 68% of respondents chose money.
It shows lots of people believe that money can make happy.
>>> It shows how a lot of people believe that money can make them happy.
This is no doubt that a mammonisam is not nice phenomenon.
>>> There is no doubt that mammonism is not a nice phenomenon.
Nevertheless, money is likely to ensure happiness.
>>> Correct.
~ T. Irene ~
These days, due to industry development, modern people usually consider that money is important and also dispute whether money can buy happiness or not.
>>> These days, due to industrial development, modern people usually consider money important. Moreover, they also argue whether money can buy happiness or not.
I strongly believe that money ensure own\'s happiness.
>>> I strongly believe that money can ensure one\'s own happiness.
Some people argue that money is not the number one priority in life since people could enjoy their life without wealth.
>>> Some people argue that money should not be one\'s number one priority since people can be happy without being rich.
For example, a couple who have worked their whole life in a small store donated all of their wealth for students.
>>> A good example of this is the couple who had worked their whole life running a small store then donated all of their wealth to help students.
The contributors said that it make them happy.
>>> The donors said that it made them happy.
It seems that there are several important factors about happiness, and I think that the most essential factor is money.
>>> It seems that there are several important factors contributing to happiness, and I think that the most essential contributor is money.
According to an article, scientists displayed interesting result about the question that if people can choose among money,status, and love to acquire happiness.
>>> According to an article, scientists made an interesting research on what people will choose from money, status, and love in order to acquire happiness.
Interestingly, 68% of respondents choosed money.
>>> Interestingly, 68% of respondents chose money.
It shows lots of people believe that money can make happy.
>>> It shows how a lot of people believe that money can make them happy.
This is no doubt that a mammonisam is not nice phenomenon.
>>> There is no doubt that mammonism is not a nice phenomenon.
Nevertheless, money is likely to ensure happiness.
>>> Correct.
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