ESSAY: How do you think fashion influences the lives of people in today’s globalized world? Do you t
학생이 쓴 원문
Some people believe fashion is not important for self exteem, However, other people believe it is a necessary part of human progress.
I strongly think that fashion that is involved clothes,bags,shoes influences people\'s life.
Some people argue that fashion is just simple thing, so we should take care of big problem such as air pollution,over population and hunger. Their view is that we have more discuss about survive than fashion.
However, some people hold the view that style is necessary for the advancement of human.
For example, people who interest about fashion concentrate and develop clothes,shoes. I believe that Upgrading fashion support people more warm and convenient clothes. Also, people could get a high self esteem because of their good appearance.
In my opinion, even though survive is also important, fashion is necessary to improve advancement of people.
강사 첨삭
Hi there Kelly! Happy Friday! I like your answer. Good sentences. I hope you will have some break this weekend. See you next class!
~ Teacher Irene ~
Some people believe fashion is not important for self exteem, However, other people believe it is a necessary part of human progress.
>>> Correct. ^_^
I strongly think that fashion that is involved clothes,bags,shoes influences people\'s life.
>>> I strongly think that fashion that includes clothes, bags, and shoes influences people\'s lives.
Some people argue that fashion is just simple thing, so we should take care of big problem such as air pollution,over population and hunger.
>>> Some people argue that fashion is just a simple thing and we should take care of bigger problems such as air pollution, over population and hunger.
Their view is that we have more discuss about survive than fashion.
>>> Their view is that we should focus more on how to survive than fashion.
However, some people hold the view that style is necessary for the advancement of human.
>>> However, some people hold the view that fashion style is necessary for the advancement of humans.
For example, people who interest about fashion concentrate and develop clothes,shoes.
>>> For example, people who are interested in fashion concentrate on developing clothes and shoes.
I believe that Upgrading fashion support people more warm and convenient clothes.
>>> I believe that developing fashion leads to making warm and comfortable clothes.
Also, people could get a high self esteem because of their good appearance.
>>> Correct.
In my opinion, even though survive is also important, fashion is necessary to improve advancement of people.
>>> In my opinion, even though survival is important, so is fashion to improve people\'s lives.
~ Teacher Irene ~
Some people believe fashion is not important for self exteem, However, other people believe it is a necessary part of human progress.
>>> Correct. ^_^
I strongly think that fashion that is involved clothes,bags,shoes influences people\'s life.
>>> I strongly think that fashion that includes clothes, bags, and shoes influences people\'s lives.
Some people argue that fashion is just simple thing, so we should take care of big problem such as air pollution,over population and hunger.
>>> Some people argue that fashion is just a simple thing and we should take care of bigger problems such as air pollution, over population and hunger.
Their view is that we have more discuss about survive than fashion.
>>> Their view is that we should focus more on how to survive than fashion.
However, some people hold the view that style is necessary for the advancement of human.
>>> However, some people hold the view that fashion style is necessary for the advancement of humans.
For example, people who interest about fashion concentrate and develop clothes,shoes.
>>> For example, people who are interested in fashion concentrate on developing clothes and shoes.
I believe that Upgrading fashion support people more warm and convenient clothes.
>>> I believe that developing fashion leads to making warm and comfortable clothes.
Also, people could get a high self esteem because of their good appearance.
>>> Correct.
In my opinion, even though survive is also important, fashion is necessary to improve advancement of people.
>>> In my opinion, even though survival is important, so is fashion to improve people\'s lives.
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