Essay: What was the first job you had? If you could do one job, just for one day to learn what it is
학생이 쓴 원문
Essay: What was the first job you had? If you could do one job, just for one day to learn what it is like, what would you do?
1. My first job was engineer from LG Innotek. It was started from 2010 of Feb so it have been 10 years since beginning. To get a my job I was studying my major and English every day. Moreover I also perform my study and test to finish my thesis.
2. Honestly your second question is little bit difficult for me to understand. I think that your question is about my wish to get a job. If I have a chance to select my job I would like to get a job about teaching children under 8 years old. Because I like children very much and children also like me as well as me.
강사 첨삭
Hello [이름]!
Here are the corrections.
My first job was engineer from LG Innotek. It was started from 2010 of Feb so it have been 10 years since beginning.
>> My first job was engineering from LG Innotek. It was started from 2010 in Feb so it has been 10 years since the beginning.
To get a my job I was studying my major and English every day. Moreover I also perform my study and test to finish my thesis.
>> To get my job, I was studying my major and English every day. Moreover, I also perform my study and test to finish my thesis.
Honestly your second question is little bit difficult for me to understand. I think that your question is about my wish to get a job.
>> Honestly, your second question is a little bit difficult for me to understand. I think that your question is about my wish to get a job.
If I have a chance to select my job I would like to get a job about teaching children under 8 years old.
>> If I have a chance to select my job, I would like to get a job about teaching children under 8 years old.
Because I like children very much and children also like me as well as me.
>> Because I like children very much and children also like me.
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