Healthy Food And Unhealthy Food
학생이 쓴 원문
There are many healthy and unhealthy snacks in the world.
The healthy snack is an energy bar.
Most people eat this when they do exercise or just eat.
It\'s because it is very delicious.
Next, unhealthy snacks are jelly and candy.
Hard jelly can harm our teeth.
Also, if we eat them, we can have a cavity.
Therefore we should brush our teeth clearly when we finish to eat.
I usually eat snacks when I arrive at home.
I\'m so hungry after school.
강사 첨삭
Hi [이름]!
I would have to confirm some ideas that you have here.
We have to come up with the best way to express these thoughts.
There\'s always room for improvement.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
There are many healthy and unhealthy snacks in the world.
>> Correct
The healthy snack is an energy bar.
The healthy snack is an energy bar.
>> One example of a healthy snack is an energy bar.
Most people eat this when they do exercise or just eat.
Most people eat this when they do exercise or just eat.
>> Correct
It\'s because it is very delicious.
It\'s because it is very delicious.
>> Correct
Next, unhealthy snacks are jelly and candy.
Next, unhealthy snacks are jelly and candy.
>> Next, some examples of unhealthy snacks are jelly and candy.
Hard jelly can harm our teeth.
Hard jelly can harm our teeth.
>> Correct
Also, if we eat them, we can have a cavity.
Also, if we eat them, we can have a cavity.
>> Correct
Therefore we should brush our teeth clearly when we finish to eat.
Therefore we should brush our teeth clearly when we finish to eat.
>> Therefore we should brush our teeth well after eating.
I usually eat snacks when I arrive at home.
I usually eat snacks when I arrive at home.
>> Correct
I\'m so hungry after school.
I\'m so hungry after school.
>> Correct
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