Hello!!!
학생이 쓴 원문
Hi! Teacher Sharon! I'm willy!
I asked for my speech.
Let's start!
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Hi! My name is [이름] , from korea!
Nice to meet you guys today!
The reason I'm here is to introduce Jesus to you.
I have know Jesus since I was young.
Because my parents are Christian.
So, That's why I knew Jesus naturally.
But I knew Jesus, but I didn't believe him.
Also, I did not love him.
So , I go to church, but I wasn't a good student.
I was against my parents. Also, I fought with someone.
I drank and smoked.
When you keep going in the wrong direction, Someone kept whispering to me.
"Come back to me , I still love you.I'm still waiting for you"
I was surprised.Because I was a sinner.
He said that.That's won't problem. You just have to come back to me.
That's when I knew for sure the love of Jesus.
After that, I got a new life.
I was still a sinner, but I tried to live for Jesus.
I tried to be a good person.Because I love Jesus.
강사 첨삭
Hi Willy!
You made an interesting speech here.
I just made some changes to make the flow smoother.
Take note of the suggestions below.
Let\'s practice this in class.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
Hi! My name is [이름] , from korea!>> Hi there! My name is [이름] and I\'m from Korea!
Nice to meet you guys today!
Nice to meet you guys today!
>> It\'s nice to see all of you today!
The reason I\'m here is to introduce Jesus to you.
The reason I\'m here is to introduce Jesus to you.
>> The reason why I\'m here is because I want to introduce Jesus to you.
I have know Jesus since I was young.
I have know Jesus since I was young.
>> I have known Jesus since I was a little boy.
Because my parents are Christian.
Because my parents are Christian.
>> My parents were both Christians.
So, That\'s why I knew Jesus naturally.
So, That\'s why I knew Jesus naturally.
>> That\'s why it was natural for me to know Jesus in my life.
But I knew Jesus, but I didn\'t believe him.
But I knew Jesus, but I didn\'t believe him.
>> Truthfully, in the beginning, I knew Jesus but I didn\'t believe in him.
Also, I did not love him.
Also, I did not love him.
>> I also didn\'t love him.
So , I go to church, but I wasn\'t a good student.
So , I go to church, but I wasn\'t a good student.
>> I always went to church but I was not a good student.
I was against my parents.
I was against my parents.
>> I was always disagreeing with my parents.
Also, I fought with someone.
>> I also fought with others.
I drank and smoked.
I drank and smoked.
>> Correct
When you keep going in the wrong direction, Someone kept whispering to me.
When you keep going in the wrong direction, Someone kept whispering to me.
>> As I was going in the wrong direction, someone kept whispering to me.
\"Come back to me , I still love you.I\'m still waiting for you\"
\"Come back to me , I still love you.I\'m still waiting for you\"
>> He said, \"Come back to me , I still love you and I\'m still waiting for you\"
I was surprised.
I was surprised.
>> Correct
Because I was a sinner.
>> I was a sinner.
He said that.That\'s won\'t problem. You just have to come back to me.
He said that.That\'s won\'t problem. You just have to come back to me.
>> However, he told me that I should push my worries aside and just go back to him.
That\'s when I knew for sure the love of Jesus.
That\'s when I knew for sure the love of Jesus.
>> That\'s when I completely understood the love that Jesus had to offer.
After that, I got a new life.
After that, I got a new life.
>> After that, I turned over a new leaf.
I was still a sinner, but I tried to live for Jesus.
I was still a sinner, but I tried to live for Jesus.
>> Correct
I tried to be a good person.Because I love Jesus.
I tried to be a good person.Because I love Jesus.
>> I always try to be a good person because Jesus resides in my heart.
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