hi;)

2011-02-14 · 첨삭 강사 lei

학생이 쓴 원문

Hi Lei :0 I was sorry to yesterday. I didn't answer the phone because of sleep. Anyway, here is a brief myself introduction. I'm hye jin and 25. I live in Gwang-ju with my parents. I have a father,mother and old sister. I'm in a fourth year student of Chonnam National University. I study business managemant, especially I like to establish marketing strategy and divise business plan. I participated in marketing and business plan contests. I was awarded by the Minister of Labor in social venture business contest. I would like to do marketing manager. I can help producing at creative atmosphere and making superb marketing strategies in a company. Because, I'm very passionate and creative and cheerful. I will be a good manager on the basis of my personality and a lot of effort.

강사 첨삭

Hi [이름]! Thank you for this composition. Wow I think you are one of the top students in your university. Just keep on being diligent and surely you will achieve your goals. See you later!! Happy Valentines day!!! Lei J   Hi Lei :0 >>correct I was sorry to yesterday. >>I am so sorry about yesterday I didn't answer the phone because of sleep. >>I was not able to answer the phone because I was sleeping. Anyway, here is a brief myself introduction. >>Anyways, here's a brief introduction for myself. I'm hye jin and I'm 25 years old. >>correct I live in Gwang-ju with my parents. >>correct I have a father,a mother and an old sister. >>correct I'm in a fourth year student of Chonnam National University. >>I'm a fourth year student from Chonnam National University. I study business management, especially I like to establish marketing strategy and divise business plan. >>I study business management specially because I like to establish a marketing strategy and device a business plan. I participated in marketing and business plan contests. >>correct I was awarded by the Minister of Labor in social venture business contest. >>correct I would like to do marketing manager. >>I would like to be a marketing management. I can help producing at creative atmosphere and making superb marketing strategies in a company. >>I can help in producing a creative atmosphere and make superb marketing strategies in a company. Because, I'm very passionate and creative and cheerful. >>correct I will be a good manager on the basis of my personality and a lot of effort. >>I can be a good manager basing it from my personality and effort.

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