Hi, Ally!

2018-12-06 · 첨삭 강사 Ally

학생이 쓴 원문

HOMEWORK FOR TODAY: Answer the question in not more than 5 sentences: If you could write a book, what would it be about? Give it a title. I want to collect data about the eve of the great voyage and write a book about Magellan. Magellan died in a fight with the natives on Cebu Maktan Island in the Philippines. I respect Magellan the most. He is the first great explorer to prove that the earth is round. Although he died on the island of Maktan,the rest of his party sailed all the way back to its original destination.

강사 첨삭

Hi Sir Son!

This composition of yours is quite informative.

I enjoyed reading it. ^^

~~t. Ally

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I want to collect data about the eve of the great voyage and write a book about Magellan.

>> CORRECT!

Magellan died in a fight with the natives on Cebu Maktan Island in the Philippines.
>> Magellan died in a fight with the native of Cebu, Maktan Island in the Philippines.

I respect Magellan the most.
>> CORRECT!

He is the first great explorer to prove that the earth is round.
>> CORRECT!

Although he died on the island of Maktan, the rest of his party sailed all the way back to its original destination.

>> CORRECT!

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