hi fey

2011-05-27 · 첨삭 강사 Faye

학생이 쓴 원문

I did several activates while I was in the Philippines and Australia. When I was in the Philippines, I visited orphanage and did volunteer work. When I visited first time, I was surprised for some girls who welcomed me were pregnant. And I was more surprised to hear that the men who had gotten the girls pregnant and left away were Korean. So I decided to give girls in the orphanage pleasure. I taught some Korean traditional games such as 윷놀이, 땅 따먹기 and we enjoyed them together. Although we had been awkward each other, we became close to each other soon. And they were used to calling me a nice guy. First, I felt pity for them, because of their poor surrounding. But it was wrong. They had their own happiness. I had been happy for I could make them happy.

강사 첨삭

I did several activates while I was in the Philippines and Australia. >>> I did several activities while I was in the Philippines and Australia. When I was in the Philippines, I visited orphanage and did volunteer work. >>> When I was in the Philippines, I visited an orphanage and did volunteer work. When I visited first time, I was surprised for some girls who welcomed me were pregnant. >>> During my first visit, I was surprised for some girls who welcomed me were pregnant. And I was more surprised to hear that the men who had gotten the girls pregnant and left away were Korean. >>> And I was more surprised to hear that the men who got them pregnant and left them were Koreans.  So I decided to give girls in the orphanage pleasure. >>> So I decided to give the girls in the orphanage pleasure. I taught some Korean traditional games such as 윷놀이, 땅 따먹기 and we enjoyed them together. >>> Correct Although we had been awkward each other, we became close to each other soon. >>> Although we felt awkward towards each other, we became close immediately.  And they were used to calling me a nice guy. >>> Correct First, I felt pity for them, because of their poor surrounding. >>> First, I felt pity for them, because of their poor surroundings. But it was wrong. >>> But I was wrong. They had their own happiness. >>> Correct I had been happy for I could make them happy. >>> I was happy because I made them feel happy.

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