Hi Gemmar
학생이 쓴 원문
ESSAY: In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
The message are very proper to children who has many years to live.
It will encourage children to do their best in learning for their futures.
But If the elderly are told that masseage, I don\'t think that they assent the massege.
Children will learn naturally that they cannot achieve anything even they try hard.
As you know, there are so much things in this world which we cannot achieve even though we try to the death.
We often face to the limits and we are dissapointed with the results we tried to get.
In korea we have a saying.
\" You are painful and hurted because you are the young\"
Are you painful? you must young one. hihihihi
강사 첨삭
Hello there Ms. [이름]! ^^Thanks for your opinion. Actually in my country, parents usually tell their children to study hard because they cannot inherit anything from their parents but good education. Sometimes, when children are already grown ups, it\'s like \"it\'s pay back time!\" hahaha! Like they have to work and support their parents, by this time, it\'s the other way around. Parents would stop working and grown-up children would be the one to work for their family. Does it sound fairness? Hehehe
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
The message are very proper to children who has many years to live.
>>> The message is very true to children who have many years to live.
It will encourage children to do their best in learning for their future.
It will encourage children to do their best in learning for their future.
>>> CORRECT
But If the elderly are told that masseage, I don\'t think that they assent the massege.
But If the elderly are told that masseage, I don\'t think that they assent the massege.
>>> But if the elderly are told that message, I don\'t think that they will assent to the message.
Children will learn naturally that they cannot achieve anything even they try hard.
Children will learn naturally that they cannot achieve anything even they try hard.
>>> CORRECT
As you know, there are so much things in this world which we cannot achieve even though we try until death.
As you know, there are so much things in this world which we cannot achieve even though we try until death.
>>> CORRECT
We often face to the limits and we are dissapointed with the results we tried to get.
We often face to the limits and we are dissapointed with the results we tried to get.
>>> We often face the limits and we are disappointed with the results we tried to get.
In korea we have a saying.
In korea we have a saying.
>>> In Korea, we have a saying that goes:
\" You are painful and hurted because you are the young\"
>>> \" You are in pain and hurt because you are young\"
Are you painful? you must young one. hihihihi
\" You are painful and hurted because you are the young\"
>>> \" You are in pain and hurt because you are young\"
Are you painful? you must young one. hihihihi
>>> Are you in pain? You must be the younger one. hihihihi
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