Hi Gemmar
학생이 쓴 원문
ESSAY: Some people think that it is a good idea for all employees to wear a uniform at work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
I agree with that employees wear a uniform at work.
I had worn a uniform at work long time ago.
In my case, It was very efficient and had more merits than demerits as I remember.
Firstly, I don\'t waste my time to choose what I wear every busy morning.
And I can have more loaylty to my company when I wear a uniform.
Also I feel equality with other co-workders regardeless of position.
but I want to have one day what I want to wear freely to show my personality through my fashion.
강사 첨삭
Hi there Ms. [이름]! It\'s already afternoon and I feel exhausted being with the little boy here. Hahaha! How\'s your day going? I know you\'re tired so just sit back and relax.
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I agree with that employees wear a uniform at work.
>>> I agree with the idea that employees should wear a uniform at work.
I had worn a uniform at work long time ago.
I had worn a uniform at work long time ago.
>>> CORRECT
In my case, It was very efficient and had more merits than demerits as I remember.
In my case, It was very efficient and had more merits than demerits as I remember.
>>> In my case, it was very efficient and there were more advantages than disadvantages as I remember.
Firstly, I don\'t waste my time to choose what I wear every busy morning.
Firstly, I don\'t waste my time to choose what I wear every busy morning.
>>> Firstly, I don\'t have to waste my time to choose what to wear every busy morning.
And I can have more loaylty to my company when I wear a uniform.
And I can have more loaylty to my company when I wear a uniform.
>>>And I can be more loyalty to my company when I wear a uniform.
Also I feel equality with other co-workers regardless of position.
Also I feel equality with other co-workers regardless of position.
>>> CORRECT
but I want to have one day what I want to wear freely to show my personality through my fashion.
but I want to have one day what I want to wear freely to show my personality through my fashion.
>>> However, I want to have a day to wear any clothes freely to show my personality through my fashion.
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