Hi Gemmar
학생이 쓴 원문
ESSAY: Scientists believe that in order to protect the environment, people must use less energy in their daily lives. However, most people have not changed the way they live. Why do you think many people have not taken individual action? What could be done to encourage them to take action?
I agree with that to protect the environment, Peole must save enenergy in their daily lives.
In order to save energy, there are lots of ways. such as recycling, saving electricity, saving fuel, not wasting food
and so on.
but nowdays people wast energy with out any considering because they have never experienced lacking of energy in their life.
To change people, we have to let them think about children\'s future.
This environment does not belong to us but we rent for a while during in our lives.
That means, we have to leave the environment to our children.
I wish we hand over the clean and firtile earth to our children.
강사 첨삭
Hi Ms. [이름]! Thanks again for writing your essay! Keep it up!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I agree with that to protect the environment, Peole must save enenergy in their daily lives.
>>> I agree that to protect the environment, people must save energy in their daily lives.
In order to save energy, there are lots of ways such as recycling, saving electricity, saving fuel, not wasting food and so on.
In order to save energy, there are lots of ways such as recycling, saving electricity, saving fuel, not wasting food and so on.
>>> CORRECT
but nowdays people wast energy with out any considering because they have never experienced lacking of energy in their life.
but nowdays people wast energy with out any considering because they have never experienced lacking of energy in their life.
>>> But nowadays people waste energy without any considerations because they have never experienced lacking of energy in their life.
To change people, we have to let them think about children\'s future.
To change people, we have to let them think about children\'s future.
>>> CORRECT
This environment does not belong to us but we rent for a while during in our lives.
This environment does not belong to us but we rent for a while during in our lives.
>>> This environment does not belong to us but it\'s a pilgrimage we stay in while we are living.
That means, we have to leave the environment to our children.
That means, we have to leave the environment to our children.
>>> CORRECT
I wish we could hand over a clean and fertile earth to our children.
I wish we could hand over a clean and fertile earth to our children.
>>> CORRECT
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