Hi Karen, it's [이름] XD

2012-03-26 · 첨삭 강사 abby

학생이 쓴 원문

Express your opinion based on the following topic: There's been news about Korea's plans on cloning a mammoth. What is your opinion on cloning with respect to God and religion? I've heard of the story. Actually, in Korea, there was one man who was ditched by Korean because he used tons of research fund in a wrong way. His name is Hawng Woo Suk, a scientist. Unfortunately he was the most promising clone-scientist and after the incident, nation's position in the field became unstable. However, recently, I heard that he became the head scientist again and now he is trying to clone a mammoth which can bring a lot of money to our nation. Therefore I am so happy for him and his trying. Also, I am an atheist so I do not care about God. Give him to a dog.

강사 첨삭

Hello there [이름]! How\'s your weekend coming along ^^ Anyway, it\'s so nice to read a composition from you after a long time! I like your compositions because #1. Your opinions are always interesting. #2. You don\'t  beat around the bush and you always say exactly how you feel. #3. Your sentences are usually complex and I like the way you construct your sentences. #4. I always learn something new from your answers. Thank you for making a composition. I know that you are a very busy person, but you still try to make the most of your time. I missed you last Friday though. \'Talk to you on Monday! Enjoy the rest of your weekend! (^___^) ~t.Karen >^.^<Express your opinion based on the following topic: There\'s been news about Korea\'s plans on cloning a mammoth. What is your opinion on cloning with respect to God and religion? I\'ve heard of the story.  >> Correct! ^^  Actually, in Korea, there was one man who was ditched by Korean because he used tons of research fund in a wrong way. >> ** Minor corrections: >> ** You have to specify which \"Korean\" you are talking about. Is it the \"Korean people\", the \"Korean government\" etc. >> ** Don\'t forget to use your article \"the\".  >> Actually, in Korea, there was one man who was ditched by the Korean people because he used tons of research fund in a wrong way.  His name is Hawng Woo Suk, a scientist.  >> Correct! ^^ Unfortunately he was the most promising clone-scientist and after the incident, nation\'s position in the field became unstable. >> ** Minor corrections: >> ** Don\'t forget to use a comma [ , ] after the word \"unfortunately\".  >> ** You have to put the possessive pronoun \"Our\" to indicate which nation you are talking about. >> Unfortunately, he was the most promising clone-scientist and after the incident, our nation\'s position in the field became unstable. However, recently, I heard that he became the head scientist again and now he is trying to clone a mammoth which can bring a lot of money to our nation.   >> Correct! ^^ Therefore I am so happy for him and his trying. >> ** Minor corrections: >>** The word \"efforts\" is a lot more appropriate in your sentence as it is a noun. \"His trying\" sounds incomplete. >> ** Don\'t forget to use a comma [ , ] after the word \"Therefore\".  >> Therefore, I am so happy for him and his efforts.   Also, I am an atheist so I do not care about God.  >> Correct! ^^ Give him to a dog.  >> Correct! ^^

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