hi, there. I studied toefl, so please read the article.

2019-09-18 · 첨삭 강사 Jean

학생이 쓴 원문

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Young people enjoy life more than older people. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. These days, young people have parents which has lots of money, and give a money from their parents, it’s because of education fever. Nowawaday, young people have studied very long time to get a inteligent job, so, they go to abroad to study and young people get free without hard working. Older people always work hard, and don’t have enough time to enjoy their life. But, young people know their life with hobby with friends or something. It is because older people have to get a house, so always work hard get a money as well, and repaid some money. While, many people who are young don’t have any obsession. They perhaps want to get their long time’s job, so, they’re searching again and again. That’s why I support that young people enjoy life more than older people.

강사 첨삭


Hello!^^

Thank you for sending your homework. 



Cheers!
Jean



Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Young people enjoy life more than older people. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

These days, young people have parents which has lots of money, and give a money from their parents, it’s because of education fever.
>> These days, young people have parents who have lots of money and are willing to support their kids because of education fever.

Nowawaday, young people have studied very long time to get a inteligent job, so, they go to abroad to study and young people get free without hard working. 
>> Nowadays, young people have to study for a very long time to get a decent job, so some of them go abroad to study as a means of escaping from working hard. 

Older people always work hard, and don’t have enough time to enjoy their life. But, young people know their life with hobby with friends or something.
>> Older people always work hard and don’t have enough time to enjoy their life, but young ones know how to balance both work/study and fun.

 It is because older people have to get a house, so always work hard get a money as well, and repaid some money. While, many people who are young don’t have any obsession. 
>> This is mainly because older people have to get a house that\'s why they always work hard to earn money as well as repay what they owe whereas many young people don\'t have the same obsession.  

They perhaps want to get their long time’s job, so, they’re searching again and again. 
>> They perhaps want to get their dream job or a job that suits them, which is why they keep searching again and again. 

That’s why I support that young people enjoy life more than older people.
>> For this reason, I support the way young people enjoy life more than the older ones. 

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