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2016-11-01 · 첨삭 강사 Paula

학생이 쓴 원문

Yesterday I went to bed at 2 am. For now, it's hard to open my eyes. I'm struggling with it. I studied in Hollys cafe yesterday. It situated in Jong Ro. It takes me an half hour from my home. I arrived there around 12:00. Having eaten bruch at 11, I did't be hungry for a long time. The place has 4 floors. 3rd to 4th floor is a room for studying . So, many desks lied there. I stayed there near 10 hours. The atmosphere keep me study. I'm preparing for OCJP exam. If I get it, I would make my own site. Thinking to have my own site makes my heart flutter. Actually, I supposed to get it in October, but it was hard to study in time. I'm about to achieve it before passing this year. And then, I will have a trip to Cebu. Round tirp-tickets  costs 400,000 on winter. But, a friend of mine payed only a half of it. By my friend's saying, It should be cheaper, because this friend suffered the price proplem as well.

강사 첨삭

Dear [Name],

 

A lovely Tuesday night to you! ^.^

 

Thank you for doing your homework! ^^ Thank you also for sharing something about your plans! ^^, However, I have some questions, because I became curious about what you wrote on your composition. What is OCJP exam?

 

Anyway, that\'s all for now.

Don\'t forget to check the corrections and suggestions I placed below.

Happy reading! ^^

See you very soon! ^^,

 

... Teacher Paula ... ^.~

 

 

Yesterday I went to bed at 2 am.

>> Yesterday, I went to bed at 2 am.

For now, it\'s hard to open my eyes.

>> For now, it\'s hard to open my eyes.

I\'m struggling with it.
>> CORRECT!

I studied in Hollys cafe yesterday.

>> I studied in Hollys Coffee yesterday.

It situated in Jong Ro.

>> It is situated in Jongro.

It takes me an half hour from my home.

>> It takes me a half hour to get there from my home.

I arrived there around 12:00.

>> I arrived there around noon.

>> OR: I arrived there around 12:00 pm.

Having eaten bruch at 11, I did\'t be hungry for a long time.

>> Having eaten brunch at 11 am, I didn\'t feel hungry for a long time.

The place has 4 floors.

>> CORRECT!

3rd to 4th floor is a room for studying .

>> 3rd and 4th floors have rooms for studying.

So, many desks lied there.

>> So, many desks are placed there.

>> OR: Therefore, many desks are placed there.

I stayed there near 10 hours.

>> I stayed there for almost 10 hours.

The atmosphere keep me study.

>> The atmosphere kept me to study.

>> OR: The atmosphere encouraged me to study.

I\'m preparing for OCJP exam.

>> I\'m preparing for OCJP exam.

If I get it, I would make my own site.

>> If I get it, I will make my own site.

Thinking to have my own site makes my heart flutter.

>> CORRECT!

Actually, I supposed to get it in October, but it was hard to study in time.

>> Actually, I supposed to get it in October, but it was hard to study at that time.

I\'m about to achieve it before passing this year.

>> CORRECT!

>> OR: I\'m about to achieve it before graduating this year.

And then, I will have a trip to Cebu.

>> CORRECT!

Round tirp-tickets  costs 400,000 on winter.

>> A round-trip ticket costs 400,000 in winter.

But, a friend of mine payed only a half of it.

>> CORRECT!

By my friend\'s saying, It should be cheaper, because this friend suffered the price proplem as well.

>> By what my friend told me, it should be cheaper, because he suffered the price problem as well.

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