homework 03.11
학생이 쓴 원문
~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
In what ways do you think retirement might be stressful?
In my opinion, it will be might stressful because of financial problem.
Actually, I don\\\'t know well the world of adults.
Anyway, I will also make a retirement plans in the future, other people also make plans.
But, except for financially stable people, after the retirement most people are face stress.
The most people want the average age to retirement in Korea is 65.
But, these days the major companies in Korea the average retirement age is early 50s.
This age is too short for prepare the retirement plan.
In addition, if I retire at middle age, there are many companies don\\\'t well hire me.
But, inevitable financial pressure, many people find again jobs and re-apply even after retire.
강사 첨삭
Hi, [이름]!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille
~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
In what ways do you think retirement might be stressful?
In my opinion, it will be might stressful because of financial problem.
Please answer the question:
In what ways do you think retirement might be stressful?
In my opinion, it will be might stressful because of financial problem.
>> In my opinion, it might be stressful because of financial problems.
Actually, I don\\\'t know well the world of adults.
>> Actually, I don\'t know the world of adults very well.
Anyway, I will also make a retirement plan in the future, other people also make plans.
>> CORRECT!
But, except for financially stable people, after the retirement most people are face stress.
>> But, except for financially stable people, after the retirement, most people face a lot of stress.
OR >> But, except for financially stable people, after the retirement, most people experience a lot of stress.
The most people want the average age to retirement in Korea is 65.
>> Most people in Korea want to retire at the age of 65, which is the average age for retirement.
But, these days the major companies in Korea the average retirement age is early 50s.
>> But, these days, for major companies in Korea, the average retirement age is early 50s.
This age is too short for prepare the retirement plan.
>> This age is too short to prepare for their retirement plan.
In addition, if I retire at middle age, there are many companies don\\\'t well hire me.
>> In addition, if I retire at middle age, there are many companies that won\'t hire me.
But, inevitable financial pressure, many people find again jobs and re-apply even after retire.
>> But, because of inevitable financial pressure, many people find jobs again and re-apply even after retirement.
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