homework 06.22
학생이 쓴 원문
Please answer the question:
Do you worry about the health of those around you?
Yes, I worry about the health of around me.
My friends and family have been sick a lot.
They are don\'t has bad health habits, but they suddenly get sick.
Among them I worrying about the health is hair loss.
Because, my grand father and my father have a hair loss.
These days I feel pressure of hair loss.
Maybe my hair will disappear in the future. I don\'t want hair loss.
I\'m trying to for health, reduce bad habits and doing a exercise.
But, I can\'t avoid it. I fall into despair of my hair.
강사 첨삭
Good day, [이름]!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille
Yes, I worry about the health of around me.
>> Yes, I worry about the health of people around me.
My friends and family have been sick a lot.
>> CORRECT!
They are don\'t has bad health habits, but they suddenly get sick.
They are don\'t has bad health habits, but they suddenly get sick.
>> They don\'t have bad health habits, but they suddenly get sick.
Among them I worrying about the health is hair loss.
>> Among them, I worry about hair loss.
Because, my grand father and my father have a hair loss.
>> That\' because my grandfather and father suffer from hair loss.
These days I feel pressure of hair loss.
These days I feel pressure of hair loss.
>> These days I feel pressure about hair loss.
Maybe my hair will disappear in the future.
>> CORRECT!I don\'t want hair loss.
>> I don\'t want to suffer from hair loss.
I\'m trying to for health, reduce bad habits and doing a exercise.
>> I\'m trying to be healthy; I reduce bad habits and do exercise.
But, I can\'t avoid it.
>> CORRECT!I fall into despair of my hair.
>> I will fall into despair if I suffer from hair loss.
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