Homework 1
학생이 쓴 원문
In recent years, technology is used in many work places. As a result, technology has negative and positive impacts on society. This essay will discuss how technology has changed the way we work and what are some disadvantages to relying too much on technology.
First of all, using technology makes a process more easily in work places because people can submit or share files on a program. For example, in the past, people should go to submit a file and to have a meeting in person. However, in modern society, many employees say that they don\'t have to go to submit a file because they can hand in a file and have a meeting in their chat room. This example clearly shows that using technology allows people to reduce time to move because they can do almost everything through a chat room. Therefore, it is evident that technology changes a process in work places more easily.
강사 첨삭
Hi [이름]!
This is truly good practice for your exam on Saturday.
I truly applaud your efforts.
I hope you do well in your exam.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
In recent years, technology is used in many work places.
>> In recent years, technology has been used in many work places.
As a result, technology has negative and positive impacts on society.
>> Correct
This essay will discuss how technology has changed the way we work and what are some disadvantages to relying too much on technology.
>> This essay will discuss how technology has changed the way we work and some disadvantages of relying too much on technology.
First of all, using technology makes a process more easily in work places because people can submit or share files on a program.
First of all, using technology makes a process more easily in work places because people can submit or share files on a program.
>> First of all, using technology makes a process easier in work places because people can submit or share files using a program.
For example, in the past, people should go to submit a file and to have a meeting in person.
>> For example, in the past, people submitted files and had meetings in person.
However, in modern society, many employees say that they don\'t have to go to submit a file because they can hand in a file and have a meeting in their chat room.
>> However, in modern society, many employees say that they don\'t have to submit a file in person because they can do this as well as have a meeting in a chat room.
This example clearly shows that using technology allows people to reduce time to move because they can do almost everything through a chat room.
>> This example clearly shows that using technology allows people to save time in moving because they can do almost everything through a chat room.
Therefore, it is evident that technology changes a process in work places more easily.
>> Therefore, it is evident that technology changes processes in work places to get them to work more easily.
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