Homework 10/9

2017-10-10 · 첨삭 강사 Don

학생이 쓴 원문

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." I don't think that everything in the world is beautiful, and I cannot change the world beautiful too. But I can try to look at the world beautiful. When I was in KTX(Korean train express) to Seoul, a baby behind my seat was crying so loudly. The louder he cried, the more I was irritated. At that time, I was upset and curious at why his parents don't care him. I was about complain it to their parents, so I stood up and looked at them. His parents were look similar to my sister's ages and my nephew who is coming soon came up to mind. In addition, although I know that babies are the power of future, it is hard to hear crying of a baby because of lowering rate of birth in Korea. From then, it sounds like a song of hope and I could enjoy it. Through this experience, I realized that there is a nothing beautiful in the world. But I can just accept it as beautiful.

강사 첨삭

Hey there, Ian!!:)
How\'s everything?
Thanks for the effort in doing your homework.
I\'ll see you later.

~T.Lorna^^

I don\'t think that everything in the world is beautiful, and I cannot change the world beautiful too. 
>> I don\'t think that everything in this world is beautiful and I cannot change the beauty that this world has.
But I can try to look at the world beautiful.
>> But I try to look at the world as a beautiful place.
When I was in KTX(Korean train express) to Seoul, a baby behind my seat was crying so loudly.
>> When I was on a Korean train express (KTX) to Seoul, a baby behind my seat was crying so loud.  
The louder he cried, the more I was irritated.
>> Correct!
At that time, I was upset and curious at why his parents don\'t care him.
>> At that time, I was upset and curious on why his parents didn\'t try to stop him.
I was about complain it to their parents, so I stood up and looked at them.
>> I was about to complain to his parents so I stood up and looked at them.
His parents were look similar to my sister\'s ages and my nephew who is coming soon came up to mind.
>> His parents who have the same age as my sister reminded me that I have a nephew who is about to be born soon.
In addition, although I know that babies are the power of future, it is hard to hear crying of a baby because of lowering rate of birth in Korea.
>> I know that babies are the power of the future but unfortunately, it is hard to hear a baby cry nowadays in Korea because we have a very low rate of birth these days.
From then, it sounds like a song of hope and I could enjoy it.
>> Correct!
Through this experience, I realized that there is a nothing beautiful in the world.
>> Through this experience, I realized that there is nothing more beautiful  in this world.
But I  can just accept it as beautiful.
>> Correct!

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